The recent History of the world, according to Sandwiches
The human species are the most violent species to have ever lived on planet Earth. We outdo even the most fierce dinosaurs and Sabre-tooth tigers in our thirst for blood and purely physical victory.
We have weapons that can destroy all life on the planet hundreds of times. We spend most of our resources on killing each other, and defending from others, instead of improving the lives of our fellow beings, most of who are underfed, do not have proper housing, and are very susceptible to diseases already won over.
And yet we survive. Despite our prowess, we have used our ultimate weapon only once(or twice). Despite all the weapons we have, diseases and natural causes kill several magnitudes of more people than to man-made causes. We are on the verge of flooding our planet, and yet we might find solutions to the problem we create and ultimately save ourselves and others. So what makes us control our urges?
The answer is simple: the love of certain food items now named ‘Sandwiches’ in English language. Throughout history, it has been the love of sandwiches that has saved humans and the planet.
After the Americans bombed Hiroshima and Nagasaki, they realized that now no one could go to the sandwich joints in those cities. They were ready to attack Tokyo or Kyoto, when they realized that not only would thousands of years of human culture be destroyed in moments of rage, but hundreds of great sandwich-making techniques and great Japanese restaurants serving the food would be annihilated too. They could not even think about that, so continues the war using conventional means.
During the cold war, the most secret of all documents had secret recipes for secret sauces for the tastiest sandwiches ever. When JFK deployed troops in Bay of Pigs, and Khrushchev pulled back the Russian forces, it was not the nuclear confrontation that deterred both parties from warfare but the fear that the hippest Cuban clubs, serving the best sandwiches ever made, could be destroyed in the fighting.
The former Soviet Union disintegrated mainly because the government there did not provide enough sandwiches to its people. Whereas the Americans and Europeans were giving their people as many sandwiches as they could afford, the Russians had the quota system for sandwiches. They believed that the world had a limited supply of tasty sandwiches, and that were it to end, there would be catastrophe. However, the people in the Republics did not buy those, and quickly realized that it was the ploy of the rulers to keep the best sandwiches for themselves. So they went to the streets, and got themselves countries, along with unlimited supply of sandwich.
The Al-Qaida and other major terrorist organizations exist because of sandwich-related reasons, and they create fear and terror, because they do not want everyone to enjoy them. They believe that only the chosen ones, with the divine rights may enjoy the really good sandwiches. The rest of the world disagrees with them, so they try to create their own world by eliminating anyone who does not support them.