Hah, this is gonna' be verry interesting. However uninteresting and run-of-the-mill the Kathmandu Embassy papers may be, it's gonna' create ripples, and unlike the Shaktikhor video, or the phone-tape thingie, this one's gonna have solid proof of how those bozos interact with the American embassy. There are 2278 papers, from February 1, 2002 to February 1, 2010.
My guesses on what the Kathmandu papers will probably be about:
1) The US may still have maoists in their terrorists' list, but I suspect there was some kind of cooperation long before 2006. We will get to see exactly what level of cooperation it reached.
2) We know India coordinated with the maoists long before they got mainstream, now we will (hopefully) get to see how close it was exactly, or if not, what the American Embassy thought about the issue.
3) We will get to see the real view Americans' had towards HM Gyanendra. I suspect they approved of him until he started going crazy in 2005-2006.
4) Hopefully, we will get to see the Embassy's views on the high-level corruption that goes inside INGOs and other aid agencies working inside Nepal.
5) I suspect this would need a higher level of confidentiality clearance, but the documents might also have theories about the Royal massacre.
6) The documents will definitely talk about the 2005 fiasco, when HM Gyanendra could not 'give audience' to His Evilness W. Hopefully the teeny-teeny details too. My guess is that the Americans tried to bargain for the meeting, his people tried to gain an upper hand, and ultimately it did not work out.
7) This is improbable, but the uselessness(actually, the harm done by) of Jimmy Carter's election observation.
8) Definitely will have a lot to talk about the CA elections, and the irregularities that took place.
9) Will have a lot about the Maoists winning the CA elections, and the reactions thereof.
10) Will certainly talk a lot about the inter- and intra-party conflicts in Nepali parties and (hopefully) talk about how it could be used for tactical advantage.
....That's all I can think of at the moment.. If you have anything to add to the list, please please post it in the comments, and I will add it here, with due credit to the one who made the suggestion
Why caste matters and other tips for a perfect traditional Nepali marriage so that you inbreed to extinction
A lot of Nepali bloggers : Nepaliketi, guffadi, and shethinksofherself have written about caste and marriage, and how stupid the idea is entirely, but I have to disagree with them. I consider their views hopeless pleas of ladies and gents of a marriageable age who do not want to get married, or want to get out of the darned thing if they are in one.
You see, the caste system exists for a reason. It's not like out forefathers got up and said "Hmm, we've made life difficult already for our children and progeny, specially the girls with awkward rules for the periods and pregnancy and other stuff, so what if we complicate the matters, and then make complex rules about who gets to fall in love with whom and who gets to marry who, and who gets into trouble someone marries someone else when..." and so on. The idea is new, but his friends probably don't agree with him, because come on, they've had their eyes on some lass who does not look like them, and it would be a terrible thing if they could not hang out and make merry-age with her. So they say "Um, dude, it sounds like a fiine idea, but what justification do we give? I mean what do we tell them if they ask why the flat-noseds cannot marry the ones with sharp noses, or those with tiny eyes cannot marry others with huge eyes?" They're all hoping that the first dude who originally suggested the idea does not find solutions. And then he says, "Of course, The caste system! Hah! We tell them some lame stories about some rishis and gods and goddesses and bloodline and purity and incesty things and then throwing out of the family if he dares marry the girl with the short skirt, and then they will be too scared out of their wits to go against us..." Since no one can find the fault with the idea, they all go along.
Fun fact: the dude who suggested that intercaste marriage should be forbidden and stuff was also the first person to be executed in centuries. No idea why, but there definitely should be a connection.
So anyway, we should totally marry people of our castes only. Because if we do that, our gene pool does not get diversified enough, and after enough generations, we basically become deformed doodlies with weird body parts because we did not bring strong and interesting genes to our gene pool, but the stupid sucky ones kept on adding up, until we finally die out of inbreeding. GO SAME-CASTE MARRIAGE! AND RESPECT YOUR ELDERS!
You see, the caste system exists for a reason. It's not like out forefathers got up and said "Hmm, we've made life difficult already for our children and progeny, specially the girls with awkward rules for the periods and pregnancy and other stuff, so what if we complicate the matters, and then make complex rules about who gets to fall in love with whom and who gets to marry who, and who gets into trouble someone marries someone else when..." and so on. The idea is new, but his friends probably don't agree with him, because come on, they've had their eyes on some lass who does not look like them, and it would be a terrible thing if they could not hang out and make merry-age with her. So they say "Um, dude, it sounds like a fiine idea, but what justification do we give? I mean what do we tell them if they ask why the flat-noseds cannot marry the ones with sharp noses, or those with tiny eyes cannot marry others with huge eyes?" They're all hoping that the first dude who originally suggested the idea does not find solutions. And then he says, "Of course, The caste system! Hah! We tell them some lame stories about some rishis and gods and goddesses and bloodline and purity and incesty things and then throwing out of the family if he dares marry the girl with the short skirt, and then they will be too scared out of their wits to go against us..." Since no one can find the fault with the idea, they all go along.
Fun fact: the dude who suggested that intercaste marriage should be forbidden and stuff was also the first person to be executed in centuries. No idea why, but there definitely should be a connection.
So anyway, we should totally marry people of our castes only. Because if we do that, our gene pool does not get diversified enough, and after enough generations, we basically become deformed doodlies with weird body parts because we did not bring strong and interesting genes to our gene pool, but the stupid sucky ones kept on adding up, until we finally die out of inbreeding. GO SAME-CASTE MARRIAGE! AND RESPECT YOUR ELDERS!
I should definitely not have posted this
...and this is not even a publicity stunt, like my "OMG! did I post that or not" series, which WAS a publicity stunt, but got the lowest combined hits for all my post series. So, whatever. If you don't like reading ahead, you probably should not because there's nothing outrageous or interesting here. I am not being sexist or anti-HareKrishna in any way, and I am not complaining that I was raped so that you guys could blame ME in the comments. Yepp! Nothing interesting here. As well take a nice nap now, you?
So, that thing is.. Dark circles. You know, the kind you get under your eyes when you've not gotten enough sleep, or have been punched by the huge guy whose girlfriend you apparently hit on, but you have nooo idea how talking about your common interests and being surprised by the fact that she liked the same kind of movies and listened to the songs which you do could have constituted, to put it in his own words, 'bullying' ... But whatever, because you see that dark circle and you're like whoah!
Well, I find it kinda nice. Not only nice, but utterly absolutely fascinating and maybe even pretty attractive. Even Vladimir Putin has dark circles when he's not being pretty, and you know what they say about Putin -- that guy's one of Runil's heroes.
There's this indian ad for a dark-circles removing cream. In the 'Before' period, I am all --"Whoa, that gal's pretty awesome! She looks pretty intelligent and sensible too...She's nice! She's my fave model... She rocks!" and after the cream 'cures' her of the circles during the ad I am "OMG OMG! She looks sooo fake. She must be reallly dumb, and I am surprised she even made it this far. What the heck, she does not even look like a Real model. Hoi, Model! Go back to your Village and don't ever show your face, specially the part that does NOT have dark circles to us"...
My theory's worked out pretty well until now. Two of the most talented and intelligent (cough, cough cough.... random standards alert... cough cough cough.. I am not the authorit--cough cough) people I know have like, huuge dark circles, and at their age they should probably be still losing their teeth than getting the circles. But still, they have em' and I am all like "damn, they're so smart, and awesome, and totally soo cool even though they've lived lesser years than me, and OMG OMG OMG look at those dark circles.. I. Wanna. So. Totally. Life's so unfair."
I can completely understand how the non-black circles peeps must be feeling right now. I mean, I do not have considerable black circles myself. Mainly because of three reasons: 1) I am dummb, and do not have ANY talent which might pave way for me to get those awwwesome circles and 3) I usually sleep between 7.30 and 9 even though almost everyone of my age group goes beyonf 12 and a lot of my friends usually between 3 and 4. So, I am a leetel uninteresting untalented mama's boy person who sleeps before most 4-yearolds do. Okay. Now, try to guess why YOU don't have dark circles.
Cool fact: Manisha Koirala has em', both of MaHa jodi have Huuuuge dark circles, all the Pakistani dictators have had them, both the Obamas has 'em, and a verry verry verrry few of our MPs have dark circles. Dark Circles are soooo cool.
So, that thing is.. Dark circles. You know, the kind you get under your eyes when you've not gotten enough sleep, or have been punched by the huge guy whose girlfriend you apparently hit on, but you have nooo idea how talking about your common interests and being surprised by the fact that she liked the same kind of movies and listened to the songs which you do could have constituted, to put it in his own words, 'bullying' ... But whatever, because you see that dark circle and you're like whoah!
Well, I find it kinda nice. Not only nice, but utterly absolutely fascinating and maybe even pretty attractive. Even Vladimir Putin has dark circles when he's not being pretty, and you know what they say about Putin -- that guy's one of Runil's heroes.
There's this indian ad for a dark-circles removing cream. In the 'Before' period, I am all --"Whoa, that gal's pretty awesome! She looks pretty intelligent and sensible too...She's nice! She's my fave model... She rocks!" and after the cream 'cures' her of the circles during the ad I am "OMG OMG! She looks sooo fake. She must be reallly dumb, and I am surprised she even made it this far. What the heck, she does not even look like a Real model. Hoi, Model! Go back to your Village and don't ever show your face, specially the part that does NOT have dark circles to us"...
My theory's worked out pretty well until now. Two of the most talented and intelligent (cough, cough cough.... random standards alert... cough cough cough.. I am not the authorit--cough cough) people I know have like, huuge dark circles, and at their age they should probably be still losing their teeth than getting the circles. But still, they have em' and I am all like "damn, they're so smart, and awesome, and totally soo cool even though they've lived lesser years than me, and OMG OMG OMG look at those dark circles.. I. Wanna. So. Totally. Life's so unfair."
I can completely understand how the non-black circles peeps must be feeling right now. I mean, I do not have considerable black circles myself. Mainly because of three reasons: 1) I am dummb, and do not have ANY talent which might pave way for me to get those awwwesome circles and 3) I usually sleep between 7.30 and 9 even though almost everyone of my age group goes beyonf 12 and a lot of my friends usually between 3 and 4. So, I am a leetel uninteresting untalented mama's boy person who sleeps before most 4-yearolds do. Okay. Now, try to guess why YOU don't have dark circles.
Cool fact: Manisha Koirala has em', both of MaHa jodi have Huuuuge dark circles, all the Pakistani dictators have had them, both the Obamas has 'em, and a verry verry verrry few of our MPs have dark circles. Dark Circles are soooo cool.
...this reminds me of the old saying: Oie ketaharu, tyaha wild bhayera baal hanne haina hai, teacher haru hunchha
Great seven or eight, I forget. I have started forgetting a lot actually, when I last tried to remember all my friends' names, I was surprised that I had actually been with those people. As Rincewind says, it's all fading away. Not slowly. And facebook wont stop it. Nothing will. Except a marriage. Therefore, we need a marriage. LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, AND MY OLD FRIENDS FROM BNKS, I DO NOT ASK MUCH FROM YOU. JUST A SIMPLE REQUEST: GET MARRIED, FOR GOD's SAKE!
It'll spread the talk, and then talks will lead to more talks and more gossip and more talks. If you get married within the next two years, I am willing to take the responsibility of spreading false rumors that you are going to become a parent soon soon. I'll even ask people to give you gifts, even though you don't deserve it, and that is legally slander. Still, I am volunteering to do it, just for you. Because you are my friend. Friends back friends, and then spread outrageous Market ko Hallas. I will totally do that.
SO don't worry about the old saying that you probably heard in AH/KH: "Oye kertaharu, tyaha wild bhayera baal hanne haina hai, teacher haru hunchha' and go as wild as you possibly can. Go even wilder if you can, but just don't get caught or commit a criminal offense. And public indecency does not look good in a police report either, so take care of that too, ok?
Lala, have fun you guys. And remember to spread the good news around. Because if you don't, I'll just make it up and spread around.
It'll spread the talk, and then talks will lead to more talks and more gossip and more talks. If you get married within the next two years, I am willing to take the responsibility of spreading false rumors that you are going to become a parent soon soon. I'll even ask people to give you gifts, even though you don't deserve it, and that is legally slander. Still, I am volunteering to do it, just for you. Because you are my friend. Friends back friends, and then spread outrageous Market ko Hallas. I will totally do that.
SO don't worry about the old saying that you probably heard in AH/KH: "Oye kertaharu, tyaha wild bhayera baal hanne haina hai, teacher haru hunchha' and go as wild as you possibly can. Go even wilder if you can, but just don't get caught or commit a criminal offense. And pub
Lala, have fun you guys. And remember to spread the good news around. Because if you don't, I'll just make it up and spread around.
The Bhundewallas: A new webcomic by... wait for it... ME!
Anyone who's ever known me knows that I am very very very bad at drawing. Like, pathetic. Like, I cannot draw anything besides a scenery with a house, a mountain, a river, a sun, and a few crows just over the sun. Oh, and trees. Green and blue and black.
And then anyone who's known me recently knows that I am a hardcore webcomics fan: I subscribe to feeds of 57 (yes, that is fifty-seven) webcomics, and probably read 30-35 of them daily. In short, I am a webcomic guy.
So, I decided to combine my two weaknesses together, and make it a strength... I will be drawing and posting comics from now on, Ya'all. I am still not certain about how frequently I want to post the comics, but I think I might do it once a week. Exciting, right? YEAHHHH!!!!
So, the characters.. The pic you see on this post is actually four different images squished into one. The stick figures will most probably be my characters, and I drew in the background to assure you peeps that it's gonna' be based on Nepali stuff and have a completely Nepali flavour . XOXOXO!
And then anyone who's known me recently knows that I am a hardcore webcomics fan: I subscribe to feeds of 57 (yes, that is fifty-seven) webcomics, and probably read 30-35 of them daily. In short, I am a webcomic guy.
So, I decided to combine my two weaknesses together, and make it a strength... I will be drawing and posting comics from now on, Ya'all. I am still not certain about how frequently I want to post the comics, but I think I might do it once a week. Exciting, right? YEAHHHH!!!!
So, the characters.. The pic you see on this post is actually four different images squished into one. The stick figures will most probably be my characters, and I drew in the background to assure you peeps that it's gonna' be based on Nepali stuff and have a completely Nepali flavour . XOXOXO!
When you want a dentist, are you really looking for FREE parking?
Really? A radio ad was just totally bragging about free parking inside the ring-road. That was the only thing it talked about, actually. In an Ad for a dental hospital. Because when you're writhing in toothache or need an immediate rct, all you need is free parking. Because the best things in life come free. For others, there's the dentist. Or a hot nurse\intern, depending your sexual orientation. Awesome!
Poster: Bring Harry Potter to Nepal, NOW
Alert alert alert
My gaydar has been blipping madly for the last few weeks, and considering how accurate I have been in the past, I am almost certainly right this time around too. Now the only question is how long it'll take him to come out, if he ever decides to do that, that is.
The fun language Nepali
Word of the day: Chilayo(Nepali)
Translation:
You need a very specific kind of history for this kind of thing to happen.
Translation:
Oh, look, there's an Eagle over there!OR
It itches.
You need a very specific kind of history for this kind of thing to happen.
Don't cry Harry, don't cry
Harry potter is crying. Because of you. You don't love him enough.
You don't care for him enough to go and watch a film based on in Kathmandu. Do you not care, ye cold-hearted beasts of Kathmandu, to let that kid live his life and be seen by Nepalis. Do you not know that when he was interviewed in 2005 for the Witch Weekly, he said that Nepal was one of his favorite countries, and he's love to stay in Manang-Mustang permanently after he retired from the Ministry? Don't you know that one of his neighbours is a Nepali wizzard from Lamjung, and he knows several newari wizards. I am sure you do, I am sure. Then why so much apathy.
There was this old dude who said life and death don't matter, what matters is... Okay I forget, but basically, he was trying to say that we should care for other people, specially those who happen to be famous foreign wizards, and watch movies based on them, so that the makers become rich and make similar such movies in the future. When you're not watching the movies, that's not happening. Why do you hate cute wizards and adorable cats so much. WHY? WHY?
Harry Potter is crying because he knows Nepalis do not care for him, Kathmandu does not know he exists. Do we really want to do this to our old guy Harry, who defeated the most evil wizard of all time several times/ Do we really want to do this to the best student of one of the most powerful and noble wizards of all time? No we do not. Because we care. We care for you Harry, we care for you. We are with you. We'll watch you films and plays(and even the part you show your junk, without becoming embarrassed, because we love each and every part of you, and that also includes your private part). Be brave Hary, be brave. Nepal cares for you. The people of Kathmandu care for you.
You don't care for him enough to go and watch a film based on in Kathmandu. Do you not care, ye cold-hearted beasts of Kathmandu, to let that kid live his life and be seen by Nepalis. Do you not know that when he was interviewed in 2005 for the Witch Weekly, he said that Nepal was one of his favorite countries, and he's love to stay in Manang-Mustang permanently after he retired from the Ministry? Don't you know that one of his neighbours is a Nepali wizzard from Lamjung, and he knows several newari wizards. I am sure you do, I am sure. Then why so much apathy.
There was this old dude who said life and death don't matter, what matters is... Okay I forget, but basically, he was trying to say that we should care for other people, specially those who happen to be famous foreign wizards, and watch movies based on them, so that the makers become rich and make similar such movies in the future. When you're not watching the movies, that's not happening. Why do you hate cute wizards and adorable cats so much. WHY? WHY?
Harry Potter is crying because he knows Nepalis do not care for him, Kathmandu does not know he exists. Do we really want to do this to our old guy Harry, who defeated the most evil wizard of all time several times/ Do we really want to do this to the best student of one of the most powerful and noble wizards of all time? No we do not. Because we care. We care for you Harry, we care for you. We are with you. We'll watch you films and plays(and even the part you show your junk, without becoming embarrassed, because we love each and every part of you, and that also includes your private part). Be brave Hary, be brave. Nepal cares for you. The people of Kathmandu care for you.
Harry Potter in Nepal: Sorry, not coming
Harry Potter's not coming to Nepal -- at least not for now.
The film based on the seventh book of Harry Potter series-- Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, will not be shown in any cinema hall in Nepal in the first week of release. There are at least four different cinema halls-- Big Cinema Kathmandu, Central Cinema at Civil Mall, and Kumari and Jai Nepal halls which might have showcased the movie. But the stupid buggers are not, probably for some crazy-ass reason, even though KUmari and Jai Nepal did show the previous films of the series right from the first day of release.
The record-breaking movie Avatar was released in Nepal in the global release, and Nepali audiences got to watch the movie legally earlier than most cinemagoers did in the USA, due to the time difference
So its kinda stupid that they're not releasing Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part one(1) right now, because the series has got quite a large fan following in Nepal and would definitely be sold out for the first week of release or so. Still, the cinema hall that brings the film first in Nepal is going to make a load of profits, so they'll probably showcase the movie in the second or third week of international release.
The film based on the seventh book of Harry Potter series-- Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, will not be shown in any cinema hall in Nepal in the first week of release. There are at least four different cinema halls-- Big Cinema Kathmandu, Central Cinema at Civil Mall, and Kumari and Jai Nepal halls which might have showcased the movie. But the stupid buggers are not, probably for some crazy-ass reason, even though KUmari and Jai Nepal did show the previous films of the series right from the first day of release.
The record-breaking movie Avatar was released in Nepal in the global release, and Nepali audiences got to watch the movie legally earlier than most cinemagoers did in the USA, due to the time difference
So its kinda stupid that they're not releasing Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part one(1) right now, because the series has got quite a large fan following in Nepal and would definitely be sold out for the first week of release or so. Still, the cinema hall that brings the film first in Nepal is going to make a load of profits, so they'll probably showcase the movie in the second or third week of international release.
Begums, Madame and Dizzu: How women in South Asian politics have such low standards
I have been involved in many many many discussions where the participants have argued the world would have been a much better place than it is now if women were as involved in politics as men historically( were they allowed to). It's a nice dream to dream about, but unfortunately, women are just as bad as men, and a world ruled by women would probably be just as bad.
To be fair, there have been some fabulous Prime Ministers and Presidents and the rest. Hillary Clinton is one of my idols, Britain today would be in a real bad shape without Maggie's contribution, Merkel's doing fantastic, and female prime ministerships an presidencies worked out quite well for Sri Lanka. And then there's Miss Suki, of course, also the writer of the book Let's Visit Nepal.
And then there are the failure stories. India's Madame may, ironically, have been the ballsiest post-independence PM, but India deserved better. Yes, trains were not late even by the second, but remember that Madame's suputra, with her blessings experimented with Eugenics. Stop the poor from having babies, and you soon become a rich nation. Madame imprisoned her opponents, freedom of press was a joke even before the emergency (the joke that goes: I told them[the indian press] to bow, and instead they knelt before is one of my favorites), she was partly( or entirely) responsible for the Khalistan movement getting out of hand, and she tried to single-handedly tried to rewrite India's foreign policy on her whims. She would have been a good leader for benevolent dictatorship, not the fledgling Indian democracy. Ultimately, she was not only a failure, but a complete disaster. And yet, she kept on getting elected, and elected.
Then there are the begums. Ah, the begums. Where do I even start. Rushdie really, really should write a book about the Begums. They consider BD their pewa, and act accordingly. Our Nepali leaders are outstandingly and embarrassingly incompetent, corrupt, and politically immoral, but the Begums take the game to an entirely new level. Then there's the unfortunate duopoly. You are either with THIS begum, or THAT begum, both of whom are probably just as equally bad. You don't get a third option: you cannot even think about it without considering the Begums. I asked my BD friend why BDs didn't look beyond the Begums. He looked at me as if I was crazy. "There's no one else. They are the only people experienced and knowledgeable enough," he replied. The Begums have invaded and colonized the Bangladeshi psyche.
The there's own own Dizzu. She's the Begum type: at least Mrs Gandhi, as misguided as she may have been, was competent and good at things. Our Dizzu's here because her dad did some stuff. Her qualifications are limited, yet enough for us: she married a German guy, so she's qualified to become the foreign minister and so on. She likes her gangs of bhais, with both Nepali AND hindi meanings. The 'bhais' threaten opponents, collect 'chandas' and when support for Dizzu flags even inside the party itself, make enough noise to be heard around the world. In return, Dizzu protects them and helps them in need. Come to think about it, she's qualified to become the defense minister too.
And if we are particularly unfortunate, we may have our own Begums. Dizzu might have to share her constituency with Dr Deuba (an MP with both her mother and hubby as MPs too) who has old aristocratic backgrounds, and would be a perfect competitor to Dizzu in a Salman Rushdie novel: a conservative opponent to the ultra-populist dizzu.
I know there are so many other women politicians at the national level in Nepal, some of them who are actually marginally competent and uncorrupt, but I am not going talk about them because none of them are 'star' materials like Dr 'saab and Dizzu.
So, my point is, for a woman ambitious (and hopefully, educated) enough, there are great potentials in South Asian politics. The bar is set really low at the highest level, so if someone's daring and brave enough, she can probably hit it big. I know a few women whom I really respect who've said they'll take up politics in a few years. I really hope they do, because for once we have a pretty good chance of being a good example to the region and to the world. So YOU GO GURLZ! Just don't pay attention to those nasbandi guys; trust me here, it's definitely not as good an idea as it sounds!
To be fair, there have been some fabulous Prime Ministers and Presidents and the rest. Hillary Clinton is one of my idols, Britain today would be in a real bad shape without Maggie's contribution, Merkel's doing fantastic, and female prime ministerships an presidencies worked out quite well for Sri Lanka. And then there's Miss Suki, of course, also the writer of the book Let's Visit Nepal.
And then there are the failure stories. India's Madame may, ironically, have been the ballsiest post-independence PM, but India deserved better. Yes, trains were not late even by the second, but remember that Madame's suputra, with her blessings experimented with Eugenics. Stop the poor from having babies, and you soon become a rich nation. Madame imprisoned her opponents, freedom of press was a joke even before the emergency (the joke that goes: I told them[the indian press] to bow, and instead they knelt before is one of my favorites), she was partly( or entirely) responsible for the Khalistan movement getting out of hand, and she tried to single-handedly tried to rewrite India's foreign policy on her whims. She would have been a good leader for benevolent dictatorship, not the fledgling Indian democracy. Ultimately, she was not only a failure, but a complete disaster. And yet, she kept on getting elected, and elected.
Then there are the begums. Ah, the begums. Where do I even start. Rushdie really, really should write a book about the Begums. They consider BD their pewa, and act accordingly. Our Nepali leaders are outstandingly and embarrassingly incompetent, corrupt, and politically immoral, but the Begums take the game to an entirely new level. Then there's the unfortunate duopoly. You are either with THIS begum, or THAT begum, both of whom are probably just as equally bad. You don't get a third option: you cannot even think about it without considering the Begums. I asked my BD friend why BDs didn't look beyond the Begums. He looked at me as if I was crazy. "There's no one else. They are the only people experienced and knowledgeable enough," he replied. The Begums have invaded and colonized the Bangladeshi psyche.
The there's own own Dizzu. She's the Begum type: at least Mrs Gandhi, as misguided as she may have been, was competent and good at things. Our Dizzu's here because her dad did some stuff. Her qualifications are limited, yet enough for us: she married a German guy, so she's qualified to become the foreign minister and so on. She likes her gangs of bhais, with both Nepali AND hindi meanings. The 'bhais' threaten opponents, collect 'chandas' and when support for Dizzu flags even inside the party itself, make enough noise to be heard around the world. In return, Dizzu protects them and helps them in need. Come to think about it, she's qualified to become the defense minister too.
And if we are particularly unfortunate, we may have our own Begums. Dizzu might have to share her constituency with Dr Deuba (an MP with both her mother and hubby as MPs too) who has old aristocratic backgrounds, and would be a perfect competitor to Dizzu in a Salman Rushdie novel: a conservative opponent to the ultra-populist dizzu.
I know there are so many other women politicians at the national level in Nepal, some of them who are actually marginally competent and uncorrupt, but I am not going talk about them because none of them are 'star' materials like Dr 'saab and Dizzu.
So, my point is, for a woman ambitious (and hopefully, educated) enough, there are great potentials in South Asian politics. The bar is set really low at the highest level, so if someone's daring and brave enough, she can probably hit it big. I know a few women whom I really respect who've said they'll take up politics in a few years. I really hope they do, because for once we have a pretty good chance of being a good example to the region and to the world. So YOU GO GURLZ! Just don't pay attention to those nasbandi guys; trust me here, it's definitely not as good an idea as it sounds!
Trouble in Paradise? Photoseries
Pic1: I know how to focus the camera, in case you were wondering. It's focused on the gun. Because, omg GUN, being used by one doll on another. It could easily have been a hairbrush or mascara applier (whatitsname) or eyeliner, but no its a frikkin damn Gun! And it might blow the blond doll's brains away (cue: dumb blond jokes about blonds not having any brains to be blown away)
Ya know why the dolly about to be shot is so happy, despite having the gun pointed at her smile? That's because she Knows. The gun does not have any bullets-- she swiped them when she had gone to the redheaded pinky's home to burgle it. But pinky doesn't know that. She's in for a biig surprise-- with a bang. Yeah, now anyone gonna make a dumb blond joke, cuz she has a gun herself to use the bullets she swiped. Anyone? ANYone?
A long-exposure shot if the bhai who helped me with these... He wrote the words himself, and then posed for the camera... Notice that he's on the right, illuminated by the red light, and also on the center, illuminated by the white light. I know it's not a masterpiece, but I thought it was pretty awesome for one of my first tries.Coming clean: okay, I did, in fact write the post I claimed not to have written in the previous post, but I was lying
Okay, don't be judgmental. I lied in my previous post about not writing the post previous to it. I did, in fact write that post myself. To be fair though, I had lied in my first post itself, so two wrongs here make a right, so I did not tell the lie in the first place, so you just ignore the two preceding posts, and go on with your life as if nothing had happened.
But I know you can't. I am sure you have been hurt by the betrayal of a trusted one( ie, me) and now you are not sure whom to trust and who not to. You had considered me a trustworthy person, at least while I was not using hyperbole, but now you are not sure even if this post itself is a part of an elaborate hoax to confuse everyone. Is this true, or am I messing with you again, lying through my teeth again, you are asking yourself. I know
But trust me, you will get over this. People always have. No matter how big a crisis there is, you can always overcome it. Imagine the families in Hiroshima and Nagasaki, imagine the pigs slaughtered in the bay of pigs invasion, imagine what happened to the cigar-loving Americans during the cuban crisis, imagine how Osama must have felt when the fourth plane missed the White House by several thousand miles. And yet, they recovered, learning from their mistakes, and life moved on. Some of them have even done better after those incidents. So try being strong and go on.
But I know you can't. I am sure you have been hurt by the betrayal of a trusted one( ie, me) and now you are not sure whom to trust and who not to. You had considered me a trustworthy person, at least while I was not using hyperbole, but now you are not sure even if this post itself is a part of an elaborate hoax to confuse everyone. Is this true, or am I messing with you again, lying through my teeth again, you are asking yourself. I know
But trust me, you will get over this. People always have. No matter how big a crisis there is, you can always overcome it. Imagine the families in Hiroshima and Nagasaki, imagine the pigs slaughtered in the bay of pigs invasion, imagine what happened to the cigar-loving Americans during the cuban crisis, imagine how Osama must have felt when the fourth plane missed the White House by several thousand miles. And yet, they recovered, learning from their mistakes, and life moved on. Some of them have even done better after those incidents. So try being strong and go on.
I didn't write the previous post
The previous post talked about me leaving the blog and involving myself in 'other activities', whatever they may be. I want to clarify through this post that I do not have any intention of changing my current policy about this site, which is 'go as it comes' and that the previous post was not, and I repeat this, was NOT written posted or consented by me. In short, I WAS HACKED. OMFG!
Once upon a time, Su wrote that getting hacked was probably as bad as getting AIDS, if not worse. I am not sure if he was serious, but as far as I can tell, it's not so bad. But to be fair, I do not have the experience of getting AIDS( but neither does Su, presumably, so that equals the field), so I am not really the expert on whether getting hacked is as bad as getting AIDS or even worse.
I mean, if you get AIDS you really don't send embarrassing missives to friends and relatives about how you are stranded in the middle of the Sahara, and don't have money but the innkeeper's allowing you internet access so that you may send an email to your nephew aged 12 asking for $ 1,200. But then, there's the no-cure, decreased life expectancy, social stigma, and all other bunch of cons of getting AIDS, so I guess things just balance out.
Luckily, I used my wit and extracted my password using Gmail. As I always say, Gmail is god. Jai Gmail.
Once upon a time, Su wrote that getting hacked was probably as bad as getting AIDS, if not worse. I am not sure if he was serious, but as far as I can tell, it's not so bad. But to be fair, I do not have the experience of getting AIDS( but neither does Su, presumably, so that equals the field), so I am not really the expert on whether getting hacked is as bad as getting AIDS or even worse.
I mean, if you get AIDS you really don't send embarrassing missives to friends and relatives about how you are stranded in the middle of the Sahara, and don't have money but the innkeeper's allowing you internet access so that you may send an email to your nephew aged 12 asking for $ 1,200. But then, there's the no-cure, decreased life expectancy, social stigma, and all other bunch of cons of getting AIDS, so I guess things just balance out.
Luckily, I used my wit and extracted my password using Gmail. As I always say, Gmail is god. Jai Gmail.
Some things you need to know
Stop shirking from your responsibilities. Or die.
Please consider the given statement regarding the state of matters and the thick of it in Nepal, and ask yourself why you should care about the more important things in life when sometimes people who you care about do not have either time or resources to help you with things you need help in even though they were extremely free around the time they needed help from you, and even offered you money when you never asked for it in the first place. Is it right? Is it logical? Is it honest? Ask yourself these questions, and once you feel you have the right answer, go back to drinking Vodka, or whatever you were doing when you got so stupid to actually do what I told you to, you dumbass! Did you do that? No? You hypocrite: don't blame me for your stupidities and failures, go back to bed and sleep.
If you haven't realized already, the first paragraph was a dummy, intended to confuse and distract and bore the disinterested. So the real thing begins here. Well done for making it! Pat yourself on the back and take some rest. And after you are done with it, fetch me some biscuit. And dontcha give me that 'Aww why me, can't you do it on your own' look, I am warning you.
These are interesting times. If I were not a part of it myself, I'd probably have gotten myself a jumbo tub of popcorn and followed the nautanki that's going on around here. Good for me and my cholesterol that I am a part of it and don't have to watch it. And the popcorn you buy is too salty & bad for the 'pressure too.
I am planning to start a series of posts about places in Kathmandu, and things that happen here and the likes, like Gothamist, but something or the other keeps popping up. I haven't done any big project for sometime. There are so many interesting things I can do, and want to do, but because of the Popping Ups, I keep postponing them to death.
This blog is taking more time and resources than I expected it too. I know, I know, it doesn't seem that way, with all the bad grammar, spelling and the poor 'stream of thought' content. I have thought of discontinuing it more than once, but then I imagine how great it'd be to write in the papers and have a URL along with my name, like Nepaliketi. So this blog is living a borrowed life.
Actually, it's not the blog. It's me. I have been trying to balance several different things, that leaves very little time for creative pursuits. I don't even remember the last time I took a photo. I have written just one paper-worthy writing in the period I had planned to write a dozen. And the last time I wrote a report and enjoyed it almost seems like history. Yes, I like writing reports. Do you have anything to say on that? No? Then shut your voice-hole and let me complete what I am saying. Okayy, so where was I... Oh yes, writing reports... It'd be great to write more, and I know my dream project with all the funding it needs might just be some 4,000 words away, but I can't do it. Not now. I am too spent.
That does not mean that I am discontinuing this blog, however. The posts will be published less often, their quality might get even worse, and I might respond to comments less frequently. But I will be around, lurking, waiting for the right moment to pounce.
If you are the I-wonder-what-this-guy-does-on-the-internet types, you are welcome to look at the "Runil likes these things in the interwebs" section on the right side of this page. I am on Google Reader, Google Buzz, Twitter and of course, blogger. And if you wish me well, please refer to a previous most published this month and pray very hard for me [Wherein I post very personal matter or sth.]. The situation is not alarming, but I do need lots of honest and sincere prayers on my behalf, since my personal prayer count is in the negative millions, and I do not intend to do anything about it.
Did I miss out anything? Ah, yes. I am available for hire for suitable monetary/culinary compensation. By 'me' I mean my skills, and not the thing you are sniggering about. Don't worry, my writing's usually not as bad as it is in this blog. I also do some programming, if you are a programming sweatshop owner.
Love you all, fellas. Keep it rocking.
Please consider the given statement regarding the state of matters and the thick of it in Nepal, and ask yourself why you should care about the more important things in life when sometimes people who you care about do not have either time or resources to help you with things you need help in even though they were extremely free around the time they needed help from you, and even offered you money when you never asked for it in the first place. Is it right? Is it logical? Is it honest? Ask yourself these questions, and once you feel you have the right answer, go back to drinking Vodka, or whatever you were doing when you got so stupid to actually do what I told you to, you dumbass! Did you do that? No? You hypocrite: don't blame me for your stupidities and failures, go back to bed and sleep.
If you haven't realized already, the first paragraph was a dummy, intended to confuse and distract and bore the disinterested. So the real thing begins here. Well done for making it! Pat yourself on the back and take some rest. And after you are done with it, fetch me some biscuit. And dontcha give me that 'Aww why me, can't you do it on your own' look, I am warning you.
These are interesting times. If I were not a part of it myself, I'd probably have gotten myself a jumbo tub of popcorn and followed the nautanki that's going on around here. Good for me and my cholesterol that I am a part of it and don't have to watch it. And the popcorn you buy is too salty & bad for the 'pressure too.
I am planning to start a series of posts about places in Kathmandu, and things that happen here and the likes, like Gothamist, but something or the other keeps popping up. I haven't done any big project for sometime. There are so many interesting things I can do, and want to do, but because of the Popping Ups, I keep postponing them to death.
This blog is taking more time and resources than I expected it too. I know, I know, it doesn't seem that way, with all the bad grammar, spelling and the poor 'stream of thought' content. I have thought of discontinuing it more than once, but then I imagine how great it'd be to write in the papers and have a URL along with my name, like Nepaliketi. So this blog is living a borrowed life.
Actually, it's not the blog. It's me. I have been trying to balance several different things, that leaves very little time for creative pursuits. I don't even remember the last time I took a photo. I have written just one paper-worthy writing in the period I had planned to write a dozen. And the last time I wrote a report and enjoyed it almost seems like history. Yes, I like writing reports. Do you have anything to say on that? No? Then shut your voice-hole and let me complete what I am saying. Okayy, so where was I... Oh yes, writing reports... It'd be great to write more, and I know my dream project with all the funding it needs might just be some 4,000 words away, but I can't do it. Not now. I am too spent.
That does not mean that I am discontinuing this blog, however. The posts will be published less often, their quality might get even worse, and I might respond to comments less frequently. But I will be around, lurking, waiting for the right moment to pounce.
If you are the I-wonder-what-this-guy-does-on-the-internet types, you are welcome to look at the "Runil likes these things in the interwebs" section on the right side of this page. I am on Google Reader, Google Buzz, Twitter and of course, blogger. And if you wish me well, please refer to a previous most published this month and pray very hard for me [Wherein I post very personal matter or sth.]. The situation is not alarming, but I do need lots of honest and sincere prayers on my behalf, since my personal prayer count is in the negative millions, and I do not intend to do anything about it.
Did I miss out anything? Ah, yes. I am available for hire for suitable monetary/culinary compensation. By 'me' I mean my skills, and not the thing you are sniggering about. Don't worry, my writing's usually not as bad as it is in this blog. I also do some programming, if you are a programming sweatshop owner.
Love you all, fellas. Keep it rocking.
Do people really get naked at the end of hikes and other curiosities about American colleges
Pr tells me that he Hiking club in his college goes for hikes every week, and then everyone strips down after reaching the destination. Wow. Why did no one think of that over here, right?
I know about the streaking that happens in Su's college. He says he knows a few seniors who streak themselves, and I am like 'Whoa! Really? They must be fun to be with, right?', without really meaning the double entendre and then he does the web equivalent of rolling his eyes (and maybe blushing? I can't see, so I don't know). Uh-oh, whatever. I don't want to know. Sorry I asked.
I got curious. Do people really get naked at the end of hikes? If so why isn't there an entire industry based on documenting such activities, and bringing it to the masses, so that they may enjoy the thrill too? Isn't that a disservice to the ever-curious public who want to know stuff, and see the proof with their own eyes? As they say, pics or gtfo.
I imagine about the roommates people have. There was this post about worst roommate stories in Jezebel, that got zillions of comments. Which made me think-- how come everyone I know has such awesome roomies? I do know that one person had a horribly unmatched roommate and had trouble getting used to the roommates --er-- American way of life (rather loud, I hear). That's one. Where are the stories of psychotics, rat-lovers, 'ghetto dudes' , and unhygienic people? Where? WHERE?
In other news, I am writing some stuff that makes sense and trying to get published again. Some of the stuff I am writing is truly weird, I hope not too weird for the papers
I know about the streaking that happens in Su's college. He says he knows a few seniors who streak themselves, and I am like 'Whoa! Really? They must be fun to be with, right?', without really meaning the double entendre and then he does the web equivalent of rolling his eyes (and maybe blushing? I can't see, so I don't know). Uh-oh, whatever. I don't want to know. Sorry I asked.
I got curious. Do people really get naked at the end of hikes? If so why isn't there an entire industry based on documenting such activities, and bringing it to the masses, so that they may enjoy the thrill too? Isn't that a disservice to the ever-curious public who want to know stuff, and see the proof with their own eyes? As they say, pics or gtfo.
I imagine about the roommates people have. There was this post about worst roommate stories in Jezebel, that got zillions of comments. Which made me think-- how come everyone I know has such awesome roomies? I do know that one person had a horribly unmatched roommate and had trouble getting used to the roommates --er-- American way of life (rather loud, I hear). That's one. Where are the stories of psychotics, rat-lovers, 'ghetto dudes' , and unhygienic people? Where? WHERE?
In other news, I am writing some stuff that makes sense and trying to get published again. Some of the stuff I am writing is truly weird, I hope not too weird for the papers
Laxmi Pd. Devkota
I am breaking my unwritten(oops!) rule to be untimely in my posts only for this special occasion. You know what yesterday was? Guess guess?
Laxmi Pd. Devkota's birthday anniversary. The dude's my hero.
Also: I still know A LOT of verses from Muna Madan by heart. And from Ramayan. And from Misc.Nepali poems by other poets. But specially from Muna Madan, because singing it aloud was is fuckin' bliss.
So...
Nachodi jaanus, hey mera praana, akeli malaai
Manako banmaa nanibhne gari biraha jalaaee
Lochan kaa taaraa hey meraa pyaaraa yo jyoti bilaaye
Bhanu kayy, bhanne ma thieenaa bisha nai pilaaye
Pyara Bisha nai pilaaye
And I am singing it aloud. Like, right now.
Also, Devkota is one of my big dream projects. I am making a frikkin' big 'biopic' on it when I have can...
Ad for the film Devkota...
An unseen voice:
You don't understand! Setting a Mars base is no big deal. I bet we'll do it within our lifetime...
['From the makers of blah blah blah, produced by blah directed by blah', and some very very dramatic music. Sky cityscape shot of Kathmandu, zooms into a party where a dude with HUUGE forehead is talking to someone, a cigaret in one hand, whisky in another]
[It becomes obvious that the man was previously speaking. He's of course, Devkota]
Devkota, surrounded by thick cloud of some[loudly and more fiercely this time]:
Our relations with Korea need not depend on what they they want. We must go on with the deal.
[really fast music, and some more quick shots of important scenes]
[A large cloud is giving a standing ovation in a posh hall to Devkota, as he speaks]
Devkota[histrionics, and overacting, slightly drunk]:
Our rivers flow into each other. Our history is an intermingling patchwork of cooperation. WE have never been closer. Lets all of us celebrate our fate which we were all ultimately destined to. We are together, and we always will be. WE ARE TOGETHER AND WILL ALWAYS WILL BE....
[subdued music]
[in some park, Devkota's talking to some person in overcoat]
Devkota[surrounded by a thick cloud of smoke]:
I am not in a position to give the secrets to you, but let me assure you, they really have perfected fission. Humanity will never be the same again. [The other person gives a nervous laugh]
[Camera does some more quick shots, and then a cityscape from high above the ground. Zooms into a house which seems to be on fire... Camera circles around Devkota for several seconds. A pile of paper burns fiercely as he tries pulling his hair]
Devkota[sobbing and crying]:
HO SAATHI, MA PAAGAL! HO MA PAAGAL, SAAATHI! MA PAAGAL! MA Paaa-Gallll......
[Hushed voices, cries, random shots, shots from Aryaghat. A TV is on. The voice becomes increasingly coherent as the shot moves towards the corpse of Devkota]
Anchor:
... NASA has confirmed that the first permanent human settlement in MARS has been established 7.49 Nepali local time.
[an alarm clock is broken at 7.50, and it keeps on beeping]
DEVKOTA IS DEAD! DEVKOTA IS DEAD! DEVKOTA IS DEAD!
Intro ends... Date of release, et al.
Laxmi Pd. Devkota's birthday anniversary. The dude's my hero.
Also: I still know A LOT of verses from Muna Madan by heart. And from Ramayan. And from Misc.Nepali poems by other poets. But specially from Muna Madan, because singing it aloud
So...
Nachodi jaanus, hey mera praana, akeli malaai
Manako banmaa nanibhne gari biraha jalaaee
Lochan kaa taaraa hey meraa pyaaraa yo jyoti bilaaye
Bhanu kayy, bhanne ma thieenaa bisha nai pilaaye
Pyara Bisha nai pilaaye
And I am singing it aloud. Like, right now.
Also, Devkota is one of my big dream projects. I am making a frikkin' big 'biopic' on it when I have can...
Ad for the film Devkota...
An unseen voice:
You don't understand! Setting a Mars base is no big deal. I bet we'll do it within our lifetime...
['From the makers of blah blah blah, produced by blah directed by blah', and some very very dramatic music. Sky cityscape shot of Kathmandu, zooms into a party where a dude with HUUGE forehead is talking to someone, a cigaret in one hand, whisky in another]
[It becomes obvious that the man was previously speaking. He's of course, Devkota]
Devkota, surrounded by thick cloud of some[loudly and more fiercely this time]:
Our relations with Korea need not depend on what they they want. We must go on with the deal.
[really fast music, and some more quick shots of important scenes]
[A large cloud is giving a standing ovation in a posh hall to Devkota, as he speaks]
Devkota[histrionics, and overacting, slightly drunk]:
Our rivers flow into each other. Our history is an intermingling patchwork of cooperation. WE have never been closer. Lets all of us celebrate our fate which we were all ultimately destined to. We are together, and we always will be. WE ARE TOGETHER AND WILL ALWAYS WILL BE....
[subdued music]
[in some park, Devkota's talking to some person in overcoat]
Devkota[surrounded by a thick cloud of smoke]:
I am not in a position to give the secrets to you, but let me assure you, they really have perfected fission. Humanity will never be the same again. [The other person gives a nervous laugh]
[Camera does some more quick shots, and then a cityscape from high above the ground. Zooms into a house which seems to be on fire... Camera circles around Devkota for several seconds. A pile of paper burns fiercely as he tries pulling his hair]
Devkota[sobbing and crying]:
HO SAATHI, MA PAAGAL! HO MA PAAGAL, SAAATHI! MA PAAGAL! MA Paaa-Gallll......
[Hushed voices, cries, random shots, shots from Aryaghat. A TV is on. The voice becomes increasingly coherent as the shot moves towards the corpse of Devkota]
Anchor:
... NASA has confirmed that the first permanent human settlement in MARS has been established 7.49 Nepali local time.
[an alarm clock is broken at 7.50, and it keeps on beeping]
DEVKOTA IS DEAD! DEVKOTA IS DEAD! DEVKOTA IS DEAD!
Intro ends... Date of release, et al.
you are just too much kyaa, too much
I just stepped in birdpoop(and I mean it literally) barefoot so I am probably not thinking straight, but let me get this: you're saying you want to 'try something new', go where 'no man has ever gone before', and 'walk the untrodden path'? Really?
I mean, seriously dude, you don't even need to ask me if you want to try a new shirt or something -- heck, I wouldn't care even if you got yourself a butterfly tattoo (which incidentally rhymes with Tatttuu) on your big fat forehead. BTW, a big forehead means you're lucky-- that's what everyone tells me, and after all Devkota and Shakespeare and all the peeps had big foreheads too-- so got or ya'. Go ahead and use your big fat forehead. Try something new, and whatever.
And umm, I am sorry to break this to you, but you're not the first person to have thought about going where 'no man haws ever gone before'. I mean, duude, going to a women's toilette is no big deal. And no one can tell you that better than me-- in grade four, we only had the girls' toilet that was divided into male and female section, so been there, done that. Boo-Yaah. It's not as awesome and daring as it;s made out to be. Instead, I'd dare you to go to a public toilet in Ratna Park and try to actually take a deuce there for five minutes. Actually, this bet sounds good. Offer: anyone who can go to a Ratna Park public toilet and give the proof of having taken a dump there for AT LEAST five minutes will get Rs 500 from me. However, you Must have contributed AT LEAST 100 grams to the contents of the toilet, and have a proof of that. Good luck!
Oh, and about walking the untrodden path -- it's not as good as it sounds-- at least not after you met touched the untouched wet nettles. Then you'll know why no one else walks the untrodden path, and how stupid it was of you to have thought that you actually had something in you that could help you take the way nobody else had ever before. You SPECIALLY don't want to get those pesky little plants near your privates. That means you should NOT try defecating in the bushes if you do not have a basic working knowledge of local flora and fauna. I mention fauna because of ANTS, who have the bad habit of getting on in wherever they see a path, and that miight include very near to your Privates.
So, in conclusion, you are just too much kyaa, too much, suggesting you want to do something new and different. I totally understand that this is Tihar and your bros/sisses will try to overfeed you but remember that there might arise a situation where you might have to go to a public toilet or the local karesabari whose geography you do not know, and trust me, you don't want to learn things here the hard way.
I mean, seriously dude, you don't even need to ask me if you want to try a new shirt or something -- heck, I wouldn't care even if you got yourself a butterfly tattoo (which incidentally rhymes with Tatttuu) on your big fat forehead. BTW, a big forehead means you're lucky-- that's what everyone tells me, and after all Devkota and Shakespeare and all the peeps had big foreheads too-- so got or ya'. Go ahead and use your big fat forehead. Try something new, and whatever.
And umm, I am sorry to break this to you, but you're not the first person to have thought about going where 'no man haws ever gone before'. I mean, duude, going to a women's toilette is no big deal. And no one can tell you that better than me-- in grade four, we only had the girls' toilet that was divided into male and female section, so been there, done that. Boo-Yaah. It's not as awesome and daring as it;s made out to be. Instead, I'd dare you to go to a public toilet in Ratna Park and try to actually take a deuce there for five minutes. Actually, this bet sounds good. Offer: anyone who can go to a Ratna Park public toilet and give the proof of having taken a dump there for AT LEAST five minutes will get Rs 500 from me. However, you Must have contributed AT LEAST 100 grams to the contents of the toilet, and have a proof of that. Good luck!
Oh, and about walking the untrodden path -- it's not as good as it sounds-- at least not after you met touched the untouched wet nettles. Then you'll know why no one else walks the untrodden path, and how stupid it was of you to have thought that you actually had something in you that could help you take the way nobody else had ever before. You SPECIALLY don't want to get those pesky little plants near your privates. That means you should NOT try defecating in the bushes if you do not have a basic working knowledge of local flora and fauna. I mention fauna because of ANTS, who have the bad habit of getting on in wherever they see a path, and that miight include very near to your Privates.
So, in conclusion, you are just too much kyaa, too much, suggesting you want to do something new and different. I totally understand that this is Tihar and your bros/sisses will try to overfeed you but remember that there might arise a situation where you might have to go to a public toilet or the local karesabari whose geography you do not know, and trust me, you don't want to learn things here the hard way.
..And finally, a model of 'falling in love' that is not actually cheesy, and might actually make sense if you are the kind of loser-y lover who can't get 'real' cheesy love but is very good with this kinda' thing
MrWangSaysSo, which is a blog by a Singaporean dude, has this absolutely fantastic article about what you should do in life and what things will make you happy and stuff. It's by a lawyer-dude who's apparently very famous and stuff(he's got a pretty detailed wiki, and stuff) and the writing's fabulous. You just have to see to believe it. Anyway, here's a snippet of the writing, which is actually a graduation speech he gave to NTU graduates(yes, he's THAT big).
...The other side of the coin is this: fall in love.
I didn’t say “be loved”. That requires too much compromise. If one changes one’s looks, personality and values, one can be loved by anyone.
Rather, I exhort you to love another human being. It may seem odd for me to tell you this. You may expect it to happen naturally, without deliberation. That is false. Modern society is anti-love. We’ve taken a microscope to everyone to bring out their flaws and shortcomings. It far easier to find a reason not to love someone, than otherwise. Rejection requires only one reason. Love requires complete acceptance. It is hard work – the only kind of work that I find palatable.
Loving someone has great benefits. There is admiration, learning, attraction and something which, for the want of a better word, we call happiness. In loving someone, we become inspired to better ourselves in every way. We learn the truth worthlessness of material things. We celebrate being human. Loving is good for the soul.
Loving someone is therefore very important, and it is also important to choose the right person. Despite popular culture, love doesn’t happen by chance, at first sight, across a crowded dance floor. It grows slowly, sinking roots first before branching and blossoming. It is not a silly weed, but a mighty tree that weathers every storm.
You will find, that when you have someone to love, that the face is less important than the brain, and the body is less important than the heart.
You will also find that it is no great tragedy if your love is not reciprocated. You are not doing it to be loved back. Its value is to inspire you.
Finally, you will find that there is no half-measure when it comes to loving someone. You either don’t, or you do with every cell in your body, completely and utterly, without reservation or apology. It consumes you, and you are reborn, all the better for it....
And if you are STILL not convinced how great the write-up is, here's the concluding part:
Don’t work. Avoid telling the truth. Be hated. Love someone. These will make you successful..
AWESOME!
I love how specific and exact he's about love, and does not use cheesy generalizations, and still touches your heart. This kinda' crush/love or whatever, I am not going to roll my eyes to, and smirk with the "Heh, stupid person. Believes in that kinda' nonsense" look.
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