Basantapur photo series--Daishain Ayo! I

I Love taking photos from my Canon S90, the best point-and-shoot there is. The following I took after 5 painful hours of standing up and crouching on my legs at Basantapur last Friday. I have a LOT more, but these I processed first. Each one has its own story.

 This I call my Babaji photo. I was standing still at Basantapur main square, looking at the screen when I realized that the babaji was peeking at the screen too over my shoulder. So I left some space for him, and talked to him. Despite not wanting to, I had to take his picture, and he willingly(too willingly?) posed. I should have taken a few more shots, but I thought this was just perfect as my first babaji shot, so I did not bother him after that. Perhaps he was looking to give me prasad for dakshina, but I didn't dare inquire, with all the tourist police and regular police patrolling around. I wouldn't have known what to do it anyway.









The saddest (and the most powerful) photo I have ever taken. All three kids are somewhere between ten and fourteen; one is smoking(weed or ciggs I dunno) and the other one is sniffing. I have no idea what the third kid is doing, but it looks pretty illegal too. And there were police all around. Sad.

Part 1 of 3-picture series. I had already taken pictures of the two gals when they were going to the Square(I realized that while reviewing the images in the computer). Here, they don't see me, so they are teasing/playing/WTF are they doing with the beggar kid who was buggering absolutely everyone(specially fair-skinned people) for money.

Part 2 of 3 images of the series
They see me here, and recognize me. Both of them try to escape the camera, but realise there is no escape. Either that, or they are hiding from the beggar kid, who''s now getting verry irritating now. They smile and whatever, and come ahead bravely. The beggar kid looks slightly befuddled, but he still goes about his usual business of begging shamelessly.

Part 3 of 3
Since there is absolutely no way of escaping the camera, they come to terms with it. And apparently the beggar kid too. The kid looks even more confused than I was. The girl with the gray thing on is either shaking hands with the kid(for the camera) or giving him something. Since it does not look like he's getting something(he'd at least look towards the giver then), there's definitely something else going on here. And that is WTF is going on here?









The last photo at the bottom was a last-minute decision. I was taking pictures like crazy in the dark, and it was only very late that I realized that despite its strengths, my camera was not built to take viewable pictures at such dark conditions(ISO 1600, 2400, 3200; noisy as hell). Since I had already taken so many pictures that would otherwise have gone wasted, I decided to make them useful by taking a panoramic sweep during some religious family involving the Bhairavs and fires there. The people in the photo are the locals who were there to worship and watch the Bhairavs. The final picture turned out much better than I expected.

We sell girls and short people

Khagendra Thapa, almost 18 now, was with the Miss Nepal(s) of this year, including the one I thought looked like Selena Gomez but on deeper thought, maybe looks like Miley Cyrus? He's also the world's shortest person. So naturally, the Tourism Board roped him in as a goodwill ambassador for Tourism Year 2011, planning perhaps to use him as a novelty(read: freak) to attract crowd. Look out world, come to our place!

See, We have the world's shortest person. Only at this show and place. Exclusive, exclusive. Spend a lot of money in our country, and who knows what other freakshows you may get to watch. Hurry up, limited offer.

Bur wait! There is more!!! If you decide to come to our place within 2011, you also get to see our 'prettiest' girls. So hurry up and contact you travel agent right now!

Anyway, I am not sure how to take the pictures. I sense some sort of err--. Meh! I can see lotsa legs in the third picture, and if I digitally zoom in into the picture, and use computer photo enhancing techniques used in CID, I can even see their underclothes. In fact,  can even see the label of the undercloth, and it seems one of the tags is not properly sewn in. No! That's a mark left by a knife, according to my forensic expert. After enhancing that and comparing it to the knife-cut database, I figure there must have been a murder at the underwear factory in China. Ohho, now I even know the murder.



Sadichha Shrestha (Center in the first and last photos), first runner-up Sahana Bajracharya (Right in first and last photos) and second runner-up Sanyukta Timsina (Left in first and last photos)

A contest for my loyal readers now-- match the legs of picture 3 with the owners of the legs. Only one rule: you may not refer to their clothes. 
  
PS: I though the legs on the left were niiice.... Of course, I am sure the owner of the pair is a very intelligent person too, and I respect her for that.

News and hi-res images at People's Daily Online, all images courtesy of the same.

Melancholy descending

Nothing makes me sadder and melancholic than what I take for genuine(and un-cheesy) romance. So today, while we were driving past Kumari, I saw a guy and a girl who were eating/drinking at one of those small shops opposite the hall. And I though, Dang! I could probably write 10,000 words about them, maybe even a short-movie. They kinda like-love each other, and then they separate, not necessarily physically, but just. And then with today's Kathmandu as a backdrop(ya know, the internet, malls, bandas, and all), the story is about how they rediscover the feelings for each other, or not. It's going to be a sad story, maybe not in terms of their story, but our story. It's going to be about Kathmandu's rising middle class, who aspires to go higher and higher, but is always stunted by everything--politics, lawlessness, and the general uselessness. Maybe there'd be a few characters who go abroad or have returned home, but they'll be the showpieces in their usual roles--they realize that they are no more Kathmanduites than they are New Yorkers or Texans or Americans or whatever. While they were abroad, they had pictured their hometown(Kathmandu) as a tiny happy-go-lucky place hardly infiltrated by the so-called 'western values', but when they are here they realize that their friends are actually more progressive than they are.

Perhaps a bit of homophobia and that kinda' stuff too. Someone who's just returned from Kansas(let us assume) thinks his friends will laugh along with him when he derides gays and lesbians, but all he gets is embarrassed silence. A girl who talked to her parents from Brown as often as she did here discovers even her 'sojho' girlfriends have real boyfriends, and frequently get in and out of relationships, something she never considered seriously in her six years at Brown.

...and so on. Those in Kathmandu feel lost because they feel this is not 'it'; they are looking for something more. Those who have returned (to Kathmandu) realize it is nothing like what they had left, and feel like strangers in their own place. Despite facebook and skype, and live videoconferencing, they feel a certain divide is created when you leave home for two years at a time. You see, nothing new here.

Everyone's going to be sad, but the story will not be melancholic when they are sad. True sadness for readers/audiences will come when the characters actually are happy, because that will show how sad it is that they can/have to laugh at such little things. There's nothing better to laugh at, what can be sadder than that?

And then the conclusion, directly or indirectly. We(Nepalis) have never really stayed in a single place. Throughout history we have worked for others in far-off places, hundreds to tens of thousands of kilometres away. That stuff is not new to us, the sadness has been their for centuries. The characters then realize that Nepali culture is a culture for wanderers. The (hindu and buddhist) festivals are more of social festivals than religious ones. The Nepali systems and traditions are well-suited for travelers who rarely come back home.

...And then everyone is happy. They realize what they are feeling is nothing new, and that they have all the means to deal with emotions they are dealing with, culturally, socially, and morally. At the end, they don't become happy. Everyone is just less sad. And that is how we have ALWAYS been.

In the final scene, there's a get together of some rich Nepali girls and guys in a fine Paris(cliché, I know, but still sooo romantic) meeting after, like a year. They're laughing and messing around and having fun in general, but they are not happy. They are just less sadder than they always are,

Who's the prettiest of them all?

I was going through Kantipur the other day, and I realized HOLY DUNG, I KNOW THE DUDE FROM THE AD! I STUDIED WITH HIM FOR THE LAST TWO YEARS, AND STAYED TOGETHER, AND HE EVEN CAME TO OUR ROOM AND JUMPED OUT FROM OUR 2nd-floor WINDOW ONCE, SCARING US TO DEATH. And later it did not seem to be a big deal at all because his college was apparently looking for hawwt guys, and for whatever reasons (will my sexuality be questioned if I concede that he miight be slightly nice?) he was chosen as the model, and here he was, modeling about, being embarrassed by his high-school friends.

And then some time later, I saw some junior bahini I knew in another ad, this time it was only her and her alone. She's, like a really nice person, but I wouldn't have considered modeling to be her career choice, and I later found out that she had been hoping that no one would notice the ad(or her) because it was a kind-of surprise even for her, and it had almost been like she'd found out she was on the paper only after looking at herself.

And then, I also happen to know a covergirl quite well(though she too was kinda dazed and confused about the covershot) so its like OMGies, I know so many models right? Maybe they should have some kind of competition or stuff, on who is the prettiest of them all?

To be honest, I have not seen to many Nepali models. There was this cybernepal/sansar craze once upon a time, but I never found the photos there very tasteful. Rather, Republica and TKP and some other Nepali papers have come out sporadically with shots that almost appear to be......, but it's not the whoaa! stuff.

So, who do I think is the prettiest, nicest of then all? Is that even a contest? But of course it has got to be Namrata Shrestha, the nicest, prettiest, the most beautiful Nepali model evaar, riight? I think that... Yes, yes yes, very much. And I am pretty sure everyone agrees with me, right?

Or not. I am sure that's so unfair to other people. It's like, I have just started reading books and I consider JK Rowling as the best writer everrr.. Okay, that's not a good comparison, because Namrata Shrestha is such a better person/model than JK Rowling is a writer, but the point is they're still good. Or whatever. All's well that ends well.

Oh, this year's miss Nepal is quite nice too, though funnily enough, I have been hearing all kinds of rumors that are contradictory to each other about her, only a very few of which are true, I am sure. But she's still so cute, as in ''Aww look at her, soo cuute, right? 'and NOT 'Whoaa duude, that soome Steak Sauce'' sense, which is kinda sad I think. Do we not have our A.Jolie?

And Sanchita Luitel looks okay too--in white-- though I am not sure if she's like really pretty or stuff, because she's mean more often than other peeps.

So... questions... Discuss among yourselves.

The most beautiful Nepali model (male, female, transsexual [we do have transsexual models right? I've seen Ujju Darling model, so that's that. Owh, Miss Pink, how could I ever forget] )


The prettiest Nepali model (male, female, transsexual)-- look for prettiness in male models here, not other factors

The most handsome Nepali model (male, female, transsexual) --I'd love to find who's the handsomest female model

The most exposed(tehehee) Nepali model (male, female, transsexual)

The stupidest Nepali model (male, female) --because transsexuals wouldn't be if they were stupid

The Nepali model who really should not have gotten into modelling

The Nepali model with biggest glasses

The Nepali model with smallest ego

The one Nepali model who studies science

Paris Hilton of Nepali models (male, female)

The female model who does not want to become stewardess/work in the tv

The Nepali model who found out that life is not a bed of roses, after he was made to pose almost nude on top of an actual bed of roses(thorns and all) for some so-called 'artistic shoot for an international fashion magazine' that he later discovered did not exist, along with the fact that the photographer was in fact a closet gay and that he had been sexually exploited but he was too embarrassed/scared to tell anybody because no one would believe him anyway because they would probably tell him DUDE, ONLY GIRLS GET RAPED. HUNKY MALES LIKE YOU ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE RAPED, K? NOW STOP SMOKING POT AND GET YOUR 500CC BIKE SO WE CAN SCARE THE HECK OUTTA EVERONE's EARDRUMS. NOw, HURRY UP!

The Nepali Model who looks like a poor, unfed Filipino child

Why time travel is a load of bullcrap and will remain so for the rest of eternity

Okay. Time travel. What happens if you go to your past and kill yourself? If you are already dead, you goes back to the past and kills you in the first place? Since you are already dead, you could not have time traveled and killed yourself, therefore you are not dead. If you are not dead, then you went to the past ans killed yourself. The time travel would violate the causality of time, i.e, causes must come before the effects. However, it is not necessarily a problem: if you did kill yourself, you'd have been dead anyhow, and life would go on without you in the future. You are dead, and that is it.

However, imagine the benefits of time travel to space travel. The time lag between earth and Pluto(the former planet) is about 8-10 hours. So if astronauts in Pluto sent a message home, it'd take 10 hours to reach Earth, and the reply'd take 10 more hours to get back: a 20 hour delay. That's a big frikkin problem.

Now, we have a time machine. Suppose earth is to send a message. The communicator goes back 20 hours to the past and broadcasts a message. In the present, the command center gets the reply because 20 hours delay is over--for anyone in the present, the communication was instantaneous. From the point of the astronauts: they receive a message. To avoid the time lag, they too go to 20 hours into the past and broadcast the reply. So, in the present, they receive the reply from earth as soon as they receive the original message, and have sent their 'reply'. This could go on and on and on. The communication would appear to be instantaneous to those involved, but in reality there would be a lot of background inter-temporal communication going on. Technically, your message is traveling at or faster than the speed of light. And that is not possible. You cannot cheat time, or Einstein's limit of C.

How that works, don't ask. No, not because I don't know, of course I know, you dumbass, otherwise why would I write, okay, so I am not pretending to know okay, unlike you, you poser, but maybe I just want to blog the answers in another post, or how does NEVER again sounds, cuz'you have pissed me by asking stupid stupid questions, and now I am not in the mood to give answer to such interesting and important questions anyway, all because of you. So, go away, k? And don't bugger me ever again, or I am calling the police, who, admittedly cannot do much, especially if you know someone ''big'', instead they might end up arresting me instead, but Meh, whatever, amirite?

Why does everyone want to become rich?

Why does everyone want to become rich? Is it because rich people can do pretty much any thing they want to, eat anything they want, and even go to space without becoming astronauts? Or is it because they can they can get heart attacks and die a pitiful and pointless death?
On a similar note, why do rich people ever get drunk? Isn’t the whole point of drinking to get drunk forgetting all your troubles(including the fact that if you had really listened to your parents’ advice, you would definitely not ended up this poor)? Since they are already soo rich, what would they want to forget? That they have two million less than yesterday? Or that they could not make the 40 million they could have because they invested in facebook instead of the gold market?
Or, what does Bill Gates do in commode? Is it the same thing everyone else does, or maybe he’s so frikkin’ rich, he can utilize the time some other way than reading magazines or papers? I would not see the point of becoming rich if you had to do the same thing in toilet that everyone else did, even those sqatters in Birgunk who would always ‘squat’ directly in front of our gate when we weren’t looking, all lined up, mother, daughter, daughter-in-law, and the grandchild. Also, to those that do not believe it, like my old friend Bi who had quite a hard time getting over the fact, pretty girls poop too, and the color of their poo is also determined by what they eat.

Facebook's gem

Facebook rarely gives those classy gems...

Two people are discussing something on someone's wall, when the wall's owner starts actively partaking in the conversation. One of the original poster tells the owner to 'shut up, and don't be over-smart'. The owner explains that is is her wall and she will do whatever she likes in it. The original poster then suggests her to make a 'parkhal' around her wall so that she may do whatever she likes. Heh.

When the only right thing to do is kicking the other guy's ass and running the hell outta there, and why harry potter is more of an idiot than a hero

A hero is someone who does something 'heroic'. A 'heroic' act is generally a brave and selfless thing. By that definition, can a hero ever be cowardly or unheroic?

Harry Potter seems lesser of a hero as time passes by: he’s more of an impulsive an stupid teenager who does precisely those things others tell him not to do. So it would be a great idea to tell him to NOT to eat his vegetables because they are cursed by Voldermort to make him actually eat them.

In the  first part, everyone’s telling first years not to go nosing around the third floor, or get into trouble by fighting, or not get broomsticks. He does all of them.

In the second, there’s a monster that’s creating a mess and mister smartypants has to go poke his way around…

and so on…

The Real Hero is Rincewind from the discworld series, because he kicks asses even when that’s the last thing he wants to do.

God is a fraud. Here’s why.

Sometimes, you find success in the least expected place, in the most unexpected of times. At one moment, you are trying to get along with your sucky-sucky life, trudging through whatever troubles comes your way, wishing to the highest of lords to rid you of the misery, and the next moment you are the hero. You become someone who can actually do stuff, achieve things, help people, you show potential. It is moments like these that make you wonder if there is someone there looking after you, after all.

My point is, GET OVER WITH IT PEOPLE., THERE'S NO THING SUCH AS 'SOMEONE' OR 'SOMETHING' LOOKING AFTER YOU, NOT EVEN THE PURPLE-COLORED DUDE WHO LIKES VULTURES AND SEAS AND FRIGGIN BIG SNAKES AND HAS A TERRIBLY RICH WIFE, OKAY? BIG FRIKKIN' DEAL, YEAH?

So I spent three days downloading all kinds of Linux-es. Ubuntu, Mint, Slackware, Fedora, Puppy, you name it. It was eight gigs in all, my laptop was on the entire time. But I did not mind: after all I was doing it for other people, who would be interested in knowing about free and open source software, thereby helping bolstering the open source movement in Nepal. I even made a few slides on why everyone should use Linux as at least a backup, if not the regular operating system. I inserted quotes by the founders, misquoted William from Microsoft, and then put pretty slides together. Then printed a few handouts for those extra-curious ones. Got ready for the Install-Fest 2010 and set off. 12 came and went. 1 came and went even faster. Not a single damn soul was interested in any of the distributions( I had 18, BTW). I did hear a senior telling someone that you cant get viruses on Linux though.

Which was not entirely true. After I finally coaxed(blackmailed, actually) a friend to install Mint 9.10, I discovered her wifi driver was not supported, and the virus from Windows had attacked even Mint. Whenever one went beyond two folders, the entire thing shut down and you were taken back to the desktop. Since we could not connect to the internet because of no wifi, we could not even research on that. One of the saddest days. I had assumed things would just work out, and it'd be happily ever after, but come on, you can't get viruses on linux, right? How on frikkin' earth did I get it then?

And then when I got home, an original Windows 7 DVD in hand, and a determination to install it there and then, I discover the DVD is empty. As empty as a parents' day where attendance is not compulsory.

Therefore, there is no god. Not even Menaka or Urvashi, whom the Jews would call Shiksha goddesses(no relation to 'sex' even though it definitely should have had). Damn this soulless, heartless, meaningless, sexy-goddesses-in-weird-positions-as-shown-in-the-temples-less world.

Some Important Life questions that eveone should be sentimentally brooding over

Where does this end? Where is the universe going to? Will we ever get cheap momos again? Can I never ever ever bargain at BhatBhateni? What is the truth behind Dasdhunga? Who killed Mr. Burns? How many Miles must I walk, before you call me a marathon runner? Who is Anthony Gonzalves? Do Rabbits eat dog biscuits? When was the last time watched a Nepali film without making a joke out of it? Will I ever shut up? Who the heck told me to do that? How can those idiots mess up such an easy task? Why does Harry Potter like playing the hero and risking his and his friends' lives, could he simply not have refused to participate in the Triwizard tournament? Will I ever have more followers than people I ma following in twitter?

I have been rather brood-y lately. Whenever I am free(which is pretty much always), I start searching for serious answers to serious questions(see above) in life that need searchin'. It's actually a pretty darn hard work, and I am usually not 'lazing around like a pregnant woman' all the time like my mother claims whenever I am thinking (I can think better when I am sleeping). After months of thinking really hard on the pseudo-realities and the possible results of an interaction between our multiverse and an alternate Universe, I have come to the conclusion that  uncarbonated drinks are better than carbonated drinks, even if the carbonated drinks can, theoretically, get you drunk, drunk drunk.

A new soft drink is in the market: Nimbooze. When I heard of it first, I automatically assumed it was some kind of alcoholic drink where you put in lemons and tiny little umbrellas, but with lemons put beforehand, so you just have to get an umbrella to make it look pretty and you are good to go. Later I found out that it is only uncarbonated lemonade that tastes exactly like lemon and comes in a relatively small volume. As they say, good things come on little packets.

And so I began to wonder, is it just a coincidence that one brand of uncarbonated beverage has publicitystorm blowing over it actually creates international tension between countries, and then almost as if on cue, another brand of similar beverage(though not in flavor) is released? Mmm. I think so, even though I am in Team Real. Yes it is a coincidence, silly, silly coincidence.

About the 'important' life questions thing, the answer to all of life's questions certainly lies in the questions themselves. Consider this: A 47 yr-old farmer in a village 4 hours' walk from Jiri does not ponder upon the question: 'Mmm, Should I pick my nose here? What if someone sees me and puts in on the national television, and then I am no longer elected as a normal farmer?', he just picks his nose. On the other hand, Obama surely asks himself such questions several times a day, and then his life decisions lie in the answers to the questions he asks himself. As a high-schooler, he probably asked himself the solution to the problem in the Middle-east, and pondered upon ways to completely eliminate nuclear arsenals from the planet, while his equivalents in BNKS(and everywhere else) ask themselves (and each other) the best ways to do things they really should not be doing, without being caught, or when caught, giving the most convincing answer to the otherwise embarrassing question the HoH might ask.

Pfft! Life. Soo overrated, amirite?

Wibbling and Scribbling was fun, yes

So, my very old Singapore piece was apparently published yesterday in The Week. I had no idea until old colleague dai asked me if I had started working at Republica. I had no idea what he was talking about until he explained about the piece being published. Heh, nice, I guess. I should write more.

And since we're talking about writing already, I should also mention I attended the first session of Scribble Wibble, a writing series or whatever. Just as I had expected, everyone was totally so awesome and instantly likeable. Finally got to meet Aydi, about whom I had been hearing for a more than a year, and other people from Vent. She hurt her leg badly after stepping on a bell, and was obviously in very much pain. Instead of screaming or jumping around in air like I do, she kept making funny faces and speaking words at random until she felt better. Very considerate and strong, no? Wait... On second thoughts, maybe the bell somehow immediately affected her brain and she went crazy, and when she was acting weird she was not actually trying to suppress pain but had gone bonkers and that was the natural way things were in the bonkerity. Mmm.

Dasdhunga released yesterday, and from the sparse reviews I have seen around, it looks pretty decent. Of course, it is also a first supposedly 'good' Nepali film that is not a love story. Gotta watch it.

That is all. Stintson out.

प्लीज, अब मलाई दरबाट डर लाग्न थाल्यो

अब त अति नै भयो. यो हप्ता मात्र 'दर' भनेर म ४ चोटी गैसकें. अब अर्को हप्ता को लागि घरबाट सातै दिनलाई फ़िक्ष छ. अब यो भन्दा धेरै भारि खाना खाएँ भने छेर्पाटि ले पक्कै पनि च्याप्छ.

धन्न यो वर्ष चाहिंकलेज भएकोले घरबाट बाहिर हिंड भन्दा कलेज को रिजन बनाएर जान्न. हुन त कलेज ले नि असैन्मेंट ले पेलेर फुर्सदै हुन दिन्न, तेइ पनि त्यो बचे-खुचेको टायेम पनि भारि खाना खाएर बिताउन मा तेत्ती धेरै इन्ट्रेसटेड छैन.

लास्ट यर को मलाई ऐले नि याद आउँदा जिउनै सिरिङ्ग हुन्छ. कति भारि खाना खाईयो कति, त्यो पनि मन नलागी नलागी. 'मलाई पुग्यो, अब म खान्न' भन्नु जस्तो पाप झन् केहि पनि हुन्न थ्यो-- 'बाबुले लाज माने जस्तो छ' भनेर झन् सुरुमा खाएको डब्बल थप्ने त चलनै थियो. अनि नसकिकन उठ्न न पाइने, नत्र 'खाना मीठो भएन जस्तो छ, बाबु लाइ घर जस्तो भएन कि?' भन्ने आरोप खेप्नुपर्ने. त्यो भन्दा त मर्ने गरि खानु नै बेस भन्ने सोचेर लास्ट यर त वाक्क न लागुन्जेल सम्म खाएको थ्यें. धन्न अन्तिममा तीज आयो र  'आहा, आमा त मरी मरी खानु परेन' जस्तो लागेको थियो.

तीजका बारेमा धेरै चर्चा हुन्छन, एता उता. कसैले सिस्टम राम्रो हो भन्छन् त कसैले सेक्सिज्म को आरोप लगाउँछन्, पुरुषमाथि. कसैले यो सोच्दैन कि पुरुष-महिला भन्दा तीज भनेको त महिलाहरुको पेट को बारेमा हो. हेर्नोस, तपैले २ हफ्ता सम्म पेटी फुट्ने गरि मरी-मरी भारि खाने कुरा खानु भयो भने हालत के होला, सोच्नुस त? अनि रेस्ट त चाही हाल्यो नि. तीज भनेको तेइ रेस्ट हो. तीज नभएको भए हाम्रो देश का महिला हरु कि त अम्रिकाने जस्तै भ्यात्ते र ओबेस हुन्थ्ये, कि त परमधाम भैसक्थ्ये, हार्ट अट्याक ले गर्दा. ऐले त तीज ले गर्दा बल्ल महिला हरुले थाहा पाउँछन् नि, ए, तीज नि आयेछ, अब घिच्न छाड्ने बेला आयेछ भनेर. तेसैले हामी सबैले तीज लाइ धन्य मान्नु पर्छ.

तर आखिर मा जे सुकै भएपनि मलाइ चाही तीज या दर संग केहिपनि लगावछैन, तेसैले मलाई यो झमेला मा नतानौं. मा बिचरो राति भोक्कै बस्ने मान्छे को डाइजेस्तिव सिस्टम ले दिन को ४००० क्यालरी धान्दैन, सांच्चे भन्या.

म त भाषा बिगार्छु, तपाईं नि?

मलाई नेपालीमा लेखन धेरै अगाडी देखिनै मन थियो, खालि कसरि के गर्ने मात्र समस्या थियो. अब समय परिवर्तन भै सक्यो, नेपालीमा लेख्न पनि सजीलो छ. आफूले भने जस्तै त हुँदैन, तर सुधार हुँदै छ.

मलाई भाषा को बारेमा लेख्न मन लाग्यो, तेसैले नेपालीमा लेख्ने सोच गरें.

कत्तिले अंग्रेजी र नेपाली मिसाउनु भनेको भाषा बिगार्नु हो भन्छन. कुन् चाहीं भाषा बिग्रंदै छ भन्ने चाहीं तेती खुलस्त पार्दैनन्, आखिर मा नेपाली जस्ती बिग्रंछ, त्यो भन्दा बढ्ता त अंग्रेजी नै बिग्री रहेको हुन्छ नि, आखिर मा त, तेस्को चाहीं पत्तै पाउंदैनन्. नेपाली भाषा अहिले आफ्नु चरम मा छ, इतिहासमा एति धेरै सभ्य र साहित्यीक यो कहिले पनि भएन. हिन्दी, बंगाली, उर्दु, आदि भाषा भनेका संस्कृत मा राम्रो परिवर्तन आएर झन सहीत्यीक बनेका भाषा हुन्. नेपाली भनेको बोलीचालीको भाषा हो, यो साहित्य छोड्न बनेको कहिले पनि थिएन. बिदेशी भाषा सिक्ने धेरैले बुझेका छ, नेपाली भनेको अंग्रेजी जस्तै छ:सरल र सिक्न सजिलो. हाम्रो भाषा मा सर्वनाम(तँ, तपाईं,तिमी, हजुर) बाहेक ठुला ठुला कुरा केहि पनि छैनन्. हाम्रो सरल भाषा लै सरलनै छाडे कसो होला?

तेसैले अब मा भाषा बिगर्छु. अब देखि जब जब मा नेपाली मा लेख्छु, मेरो दिमाग मा इंग्लिश सजिलो लाग्ने मेरा पाठक प्राथमिकतामा हुनेछन्, ना कि साहित्यिकता.

आज लै तेत्ती नै हो. मलाइ पार्टी मा जानुछ, जाने कि नजाने भनेर दोधार मा छु. एसो सोच्छु, जाउँ जस्तो लाग्छा, फेरी आआ के गइ राख्ननु जस्तो नि लाग्छ. अब गएँ भए १ घण्टा भित्र जान्छु होला, नत्र पर्सि को लागि काम सक्याउनु पर्ने छ, तेइ गर्ने होला.

Of Momos, and more

I love momos.

For the last eighteen months, I have eaten momos from perhaps forty-ish(fifty-ish?) different places in Kathmandu. So I was very excited and surprised to see a post in Nepaliketi featuring different awesome places to eat in Kathmandu. Perhaps I am new to this 'eating out' thing, or maybe Nepaliketi's tastes are very different than mine, but I found surprisingly few places in her list of good places to eat in Kathmandu that I liked too.

That is not good for me. I have begun considering myself a connoisseur of sorts of momos, who is able to differentiate between the northern momos, and central momos and southern momos. I was assuming I had eaten them at all places worth eating in Kathmandu(except Everest momo, where I am never ever ever going but I am not going there) when she mentioned place(s) in New Road I have not even heard of. And even for places I have been to, my experience at certain places seems to differ significantly from other people. Not good at all. I am supposed to be the King of chicken momos, able to recognize the origin of a momo from its very shape and the boso content in it. At yet, it seems I have not been to some of the most popular places around.

To be fair, its a very provincial thing, even for Kathmanduites. Not many living around Lazimpat/Chakrapath will know of the Katti Rolls place below Naya Baneshwar Departmental Store which has THE Best Rolls around and one of the best momos and people from Baneshwar are less likely to know of lesser-known places.

However, that is not a fair justification. I have decided: I am waging a momowar! I am spending MOST of money I earn for the next 6 months in momos from new places.

Also, I miight be 'reviewing' momos and stuffs like that from now on...

Why doesn't everyone like parties? A highly philosophical and big-worded treatment of the paradox of funtimes

I have missed the last three 'parties' I should have been in. I was sick in the first one, bored in the second one, and 'will be' tired and other-things-that-will-justify-my-absence in the third one. This raises a serious question that I must answer if I want to solve my problems in life: why don't I like parties, and why don't girls like wearing kurthas, even though they are (apparently, of course) a lot more comfier than wearing other formal dresses with high heels?

It all comes down to expectations and real-life practicalities. My expectations from a perfect party are somewhat different from what happens in those that I am supposed to attend, a conflict of interest that causes cracks in the very fabric of the universe and can be solved only by the minor quantum fluctuations taking place that can transport photons and other similarly light particles into the future and past, and enable teleportation. Allow me to make things clear:

What I expect

A lot of people with diverse backgrounds, education and experiences, most of whom are progressively inclined, believe in personal freedom and will not consider me stupid even if I keep telling fart jokes all the time. They will talk, maybe drink a little, dance a little, talk more, laugh from their hearts, all this in a niice ambient restaurant that does not allow drunk and/or crazy people in. Then they will talk about their work, about their graduate life in UCLA and grad schooling in London, and their experiences in the middle east. Nice dresses, not necessarily formal or conventional, somewhat hippie. Funtimes.

 What actually does happen

A bunch of guys and gals divided straight away into two groups: those that want to get crazy drunk, and those that don't. The boundaries appear to fade away as everyone pretends to dance (dancing: flailing your arms and legs in some kind pattern confidently to convince people that you know what you're doing) to the loud unbearable music from a band you promised never to hear after...Everyone's mostly talking about nothing, and the others are taking pictures of everyone pretending to dance and pretending to talk. It's finally time to eat, everyone attacks, photoes are clicked, more sweats, party over; we had SO MUCH fun everyone, we should do it again. Boring times. Mehh!

Therefore, I will run away for as long as I can, and then they will catch me to 'rag' me and then get me to wear a yellow sari, coz' duude, my supposedly 'yellow' tie is not at all yellow but gold, and that is against the dress code. Have fun, you cross-dressing  brave man.

The very secret identity of GG is out people, and I am not excited

With all the whistle-blowing going around with all the wikileaks stuffs and all, I finally discovered who GG is. And it was the biggest MEEEHHH, A BIG FRIIKKIN' MEHH moment.

It started three weeks ago, when everyone suddenly started talking about GG. She was apparently from one of those convents. That is it. Maybe she had also scaled the Everest, fought with the Tigers from Almorah to save a village of innocent men and children, discovered the most cheap and efficient way to filter water and kill all the harmful bacteria, saving millions of lives yearly and done other similarly cool-y stuff, but I was not told. It was always 'I have to meet GG', ' I need to borrow something from GG', 'I think GG can do it', 'Lets talk to GG about it' and so on. So I had prettty big ideas about who and what GG must be. So when I discovered who she was today when she was doing something very 'important' work of public service, I had the 'oh what a biiig whoop' moment. I had seen her for, like, 2-3 times(one notices new people) and the moment was as uninteresting as it could possibly have been.

I still have no idea what GG is about. I believe I saw her once after that 'work' today, but it was only momentarily, so I have no idea to find out if she radiates high-energy radiation or has laser vision, or whatever. Mission: discover what GG is about.

Did Selena Gomez just become Miss Nepal 2010 or what?

Just heard (read actually, and am listening the interview right now, but whatever) that SELENA GOMEZ became the Miss Nepal 2010. Is that right? Can somebody please confirm that?

Newsflash: Nepali Perezhilton lexlimbu says that some Sadichha Shrestha is actually Miss Nepal 2010 and NOT Selena Gomez, as I previously stated. Not my fault though, she does look like Selena Gomez. Pic from Lex Limbu again, with permission.

So the gal just won Rs. 50,000 cash, a Cherry QQ3 car, and lots of products endorsements for Dabur Nepal for at least a year. Well done(mainly because a cousin thinks she deserves it, and looking at her pic, she certainly does) unlike ahem, last year's miss nepal which I am not going to talk about because I dont want to be mean

Other winners as follows:


Miss Beautiful Hair: Sujata Swar
Miss Photogenic: Sadichha Shrestha

Miss Beautiful Smile: Anita Acharya

Miss Smart Walk: Sadichha Shrestha

Miss Personality: Sadichha Shrestha

Miss Beautiful Complexion: Priya Rani Lama

Miss Friendship: Chandani Dewaju

Miss Talent: Pushpanjali KC

Miss Public Choice: Sanyukta Timsina



No pics for others, 'coz mehh!

Entire coverage on Lexlimbu. Great guy--was mentioned in the opening credits of Kohi... Mero...  Also covered the flashmob thing.