This is the first of four posts where I'll discuss social observations and discoveries of the wedding. I've written before about finally being comfortable with Americans. This series will go deep into the details. How exactly have my relationships changed? How have I changed? How do I plan to adapt to the changing circumstances? We're overdoing all of this, but it's important for me.
In the wedding I made over 40 classmates from Tufts. The ones I knew were well into the teens, perhaps early 20's. A large number of them -- admittedly mostly of Asian or Indian origin -- are partnered up, and ready to move into permanent housing.
That was a bit of a surprise. My understanding of Americans was that they took their own sweet time. It turns out to not have been the case. Had I been in constant contact with everyone, on social media maybe, I'd have considered accelerating my timeline a lot earlier. Or perhaps been even more miserable of my situation? Wallowing in self-hate is easy and fun! I didn't consider settling down with someone and getting ready to buy a house because I figured people were delaying it. It's mostly the white friends, it turns out. It doesn't affect me that much, but a big data point for consideration.
I'll write more in the coming posts. Not much cross-pollination happened between my college friends and each others' partners. A shockingly large number ended up with college people too. Wonder what's behind that.
In retrospect, had I gone to NYC after college and maintained close touch with da 'gang', I'd have found myself in a very different situation that the one I am in now. That's unfair, it's hindsight. I took the best decision I could at the time, given the choices and options I had. No regrets here, just a consideration of how things might have turned out.
Ego is a wild beast, and needs taming at the earliest.
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