The microwaved banana gets a life

 such freewriting much judgment ouch

Microwaved bananas are a gruesome concept unless the idea is to shove the gloopy mess into a small bottle without severely harming the bottle or one's self, though an alternative few have thought of is to just eat the frozen bananas, raw, no questions asked. one imagines that there's not too many easier ways to get rid of bananas in an non-industrial context, unless there's close collaboration with the 'disappearance' industry, but those buggers can't be trusted for shit, so it's safe to ignore that idea for the moment.

And then there's the problem of the stench, unfortunately. Sugarly caramel flavor, the aroma will spread all around the house, seep into your favourite shirts and deep into the seams of the couch. Two days later you have buddies coming over, and they're asking you why they can smell bananas, possibly rotten, then you'll have to explain them of the strange activity that involved you microwaving the popular food because you watched this youtube video and yeah yeah it was true whatever they said but you wanted to test the fact for sure. You know because there's so many lies and fabrications on the internet you can't tell for sure what's real and what's not.

And then somehow eventually that fucking mess of microwaved banana will get itself a nice job an apartment in a fancy place and then move in with somebody a year later, ready to buy an expensive house in one of the most happening larger urban area. You wonder, am I worse than a microwaved mess of overripe banana, oh dear, where did I go wrong. There's nobody to answer, you realize you've been talking to yourself on the mirror all these years. Oh how time has gone by, what are you going to do now.

Two years later you see that mess of microwaved banana smartly dressed in designer casual clothes taking its dogs out for a walk. Dogs. Plural. A large dog and a smallish one. You nod at each other, give a slight smile. Something comes up and you raise you eyebrows, signalling, wow two dogs and a large one as well, are you really that well off or are you imprisoning that poor guy inside your small pathetic apartment.

He gets the intent of your browraise and replies cheerfully that they ended up finding a house slightly outside the downtown but its got a large plot of land so the dogs can walk and run around free, got two chicken as well. And now they're thinking of having the baby. It's been a long time since you guys caught up, gotta do something, the banana tells you.

You nod your head in agreement, almost violently so, and say yes yes most definitely. Why don't you text me which of the coming weeks you guys are free and we'll organize something it'll be so much fun. I haven't really met your partner, seems serious now, you tell him.

And then you guys make your way, both fully accepting the fact you might never see the other ever again.