Exhausting shit

it is clear as the light of the SoCal summer day,
that for me dealing with hard experiences is
as hard as it gets,
and confrontations are the worst, with people good and nice
for there is nothing to tell to fix the situation.
the mind is tired, the body too,
unable to cope with the realities of
truth-telling and carrying feelings of others
it gets tiring, exhausting even and one must rest
a daylong bout of resting, surely that must take care
of the things to fix after doing what I fear
it's to be avoided, such things for me
but with little experience they overwhelm completely
it's important, the basic skills of life this is
but not yet, clearly,
for I would rather suffer a hundred cuts
a thousand minor, here and there
than ripoff the bandaid of emotional concern,
killing me softly,
oh but it was done,
what a relief.