Recipe for rice pudding to serve the ascetic in the pine forest that has stolen everyone's attention

Ingredients

Rice: 2 cups
Milk: 3 cups
Sugar: 4 spoons
Nuts and raisins: a good handful
Salt: just a pinch
Ghee: 2 spoons
Optional: Mango (four small slices)

Steps:

1. The most important part of the recipe is to pay attention to the fire and your pot, and not at the extremely attractive ascetic walking on the street whom they're calling Yogeshvara, Shiva, king of the yogis, the ultimate practitioner of the art to bring one to a higher realm. Focus. Focus!
   
   
2. Boil the rice in milk until it's soft, add sugar to the milk as it starts warming so you don't break the cooked rice.
   
   
3. Add chopped nuts and raisins 3 minutes before it's cooked.
   
   
4. Add a pinch of salt and ghee after the pudding has been cooked and give it a couple of swirls, make sure the ghee is seen, you want the dreamboat ascetic who's attracting the wives of the sages like a sweet attracts flies, do not give in to your desire to follow him like somebody who has lost control of their senses. DO NOT LET YOUR CLOTHES FLOW OUT OF YOUR BODY! Cooking unclothed is a bad idea and accidents can cause great bodily harm to you.
   
   
5. Make sure you're looking at the mango as you're cutting it into four long slices, you don't want to cut your fingers as you stare at the ascetic or imagine him the form of the mango and desire him until you can do it no more.
   
   
6. Carefully transfer the pudding into a bowl and garnish it with the slices of mango. Make sure you let it cool down before you  take it to the ascetic otherwise you'll burn your hands. Don't be distracted and lose your mind, pay attention to what's happening around you!
   
   
7. After the pudding has been cooled reasonably, take it to the ascetic, while still maintaining your senses and good judgment!