A thousand posts, a thousand goddamn posts in a year, a goddamn mfking celebration is what this is

 I did it, I did it. 

 Still haven't gotten into proper writing habit, every day morning and evening no 'inspiration' or 'mood' required, but I freaking finally did a thousand days a year here. It's more than the next best year by more than a factor of two and very soon, I'm going to be at a point where the number of posts this year will exceed everything I've written before this combined. In number of posts and in words.

There's still a long way to go. Still need to write my novels. Still need to plot out novels. Need to learn to write well, one way or the other. Need figuring out how to be properly disciplined. Discover the secrets of real writers. Not be lazy, learn to overcome the lazy techniques I've used as a crutch over the last decade. If I can keep going, I will succesfully unlearn all the lessons that have taken me to this point, and it will be the greatest achievement ever.

This year I'm getting to a million words on this blog. At my other, secret place, I've gotten to 220k words in the past eighteen months. A massive accomplishment if I may say so myself. Getting to a million words written will be a hard but it's the first step in learning to write. They say to work very hard to get there, and throw it all out because it's trash. So true. I'm ready to throw it all out and learn, break down to the essentials and start from scratch.

What the last year and a half have taught me is that writing cannot be a chore if you intend to do it for good. It needs to be a part of your life, like taking a shower, or brushing or eating. You should feel constipated if you don't write. Getting fingers on the keyboard, setting deadlines for yourself is how real writing gets done, not by staring at the screen and waiting for the inspiration to come to you. Inspiration is like the first brick that starts a house, not a bird that brings that golden gift from the gods. It's a germ of an idea, not the magical element that breathes life into words.

I should reward myself, somehow. Maybe eat at dominos tomorrow. Go to Mike's and get some pizza and beer, if the weather is willing. Jump around play around. It's a time for celebration certainly but that doesn't mean I'll stop writing. It's an inspiration to go in even harder. If I could just make myself sit down and write for an hour in the morning, and an hour in the evening, without waiting for inspiration without being distracted by the internet, that'd be a big achievement. It would be great for writing habits and it would be a great form of meditation, to help me focus on one thing for long periods of time. If I can write and I can attempt at writing well, there's no thing in the world that I can't do.

A friend...well maybe they're not really a friend...more like someone I know...said to me recently I should apply to one of the magazines in Kathmandu and write for them because I have the passion to write and can write pretty decently, better than most people who're writing for them anyway. And that idea isn't great because there's no reason for me to wrie for those publications, the money's nothing, the outreach is nothing, and it doesn't add to my resume or whatever. It could instead be a liability. One point that I have to consider however is that if I want to be a writer, and I know I'm not a particularly talented person so I have to get their through hard work and sheer tenacity, why not write non-fiction pieces, dare I saw 'thought' pieces. Fluffy they may be, but they'll get edited they'll be discussed and they're something I can add in my...album when I am...applying to be...a...whatever. I don't know where that would get me, but writing for newspapers and magazines is something I've thought about for the last eleven years. A column, a weekly one, called Tall tales from Afar, I've mentioned it here before. Perhaps it's time to dust off that idea.

I'm super-excited yes. And I'll be so much more excited when I truly believe that my writing has improved. At this point it's about the word counts, the post numbers, not the quality of what's being written. Any reader would have a terrible time going through this blog. I can change that, I should work towards changing that. That's my next goal. Until this point I've been a selfish writer, writing only for myself. From now I must try to be generous, and make it easy for the reader to understand what's going in my head. Isn't that the point of writing, and communication in general, after all?