Friend-of-the-house I is over, roommates BB PK and I are discussing the merits of a bidet.
PK and I are pro, I and BB, the Americans are against. Of course.
I offered to buy a nice bidet for the house last Christmas as a gift, it was rejected. PK has been seeing a tonne of adds for a heavily marked-up and well-marketed bidet on instagram. He wants it. B doesn't. I do but I'm not jumping for it.
I'm used to seeing a bit of blood on the toilet paper once a couple of days, the Americans say. What, we say, that's not right, you shouldn't take that normally. With a bidet that would never happen!
Conversations about 'swamp ass' come up, the general argument is if the bidet is high enough quality with the driers it would be acceptable.
The way to sell Americans bidets is not through the functional argument, it's to tell them that they couldn't afford a good one, because they're gross and poor and not classy enough. They don't deserve the good stuff. Then they'll be lining up or hygienic great bidet attachments. haah.
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