Slate dark chocolate milk, not so great

This is a review of slate dark chocolate milk, if you're a PR person in the company please don't harass me.

I went to Pemberton farm earlier this evening for a walk, and saw this can of 'dark chocolate milk' by slate.

As anybody who's ever been to these pages before is aware, I'm a bit of a fan of chocolates of the darker kind, so a class of milk catered specifically to my tastes was intriguing. Just as enticing was the fact that it was lactose free which meant I wouldn't have to take those tiny weird tablets before drinking the milk.

So without thinking, out of excitement at the possibility of discovering a new class of drinks I could be in love with, I opened the can and took a sip.

Disappointment.

I carefully peered at the ingredients and instructions. The can instructed the user to vigorously shake it before consumption, something I'd missed doing. And in the ingredients, 'lactose sugar' was prominently missing -- they'd converted it to something else. Which normally I'd appreciate, but this did not taste like milk at all. So...flavorless, it tasted mildly of chalky chocolate powder inside a cup of room-temperature fat-free milk which has all the flavor chemicals pulled out of it. I'm no friend of the dairy industry, but it was unclear to me why they'd permitted the purveyors of this drink to call it a 'milk'.

The taste improved as I drank through the can, it was even vaguely pleasant. The bottom dredge taste quite decent. However, there was nothing 'dark' about the chocolate or milk in the drink, perhaps it was just the brand name?

Either way, what a disappointment it was. Yeah it's cheap at two fifty a can, but not something I'd give a second try. It's like a 'healthier' version of the drink everybody loved as a child, but lacking in any of the features (mostly sugar and smooth texture) that made the original drink possible.