- A caffeine-head. They're like meth-heads, but they don't have to inject the liquid into their veins, they do it orally. You can tell it from their eyes that something is...not right...and they need immediate medical intervention, but ah well, the healthcare of this country...
- The techbro using it as a cheap office-space. He will take his meetings there, he will do brainstorming sessions with no shame, and just run the space like it was his personal wework..
- An Italian mafiaso boss, for obvious reasons
- Or any mafia boss, for that matter. Don't know why I needed to specify Italian. Though the Italians ARE known for their specific coffee tastes I guess..
- A heavy metal singer who really really needs to practice before the show, and he's so very nervous
- and his bandmate, who seems even more jumpy than he is, so high-energy...How many cups of coffee did they REALLY take to be this high on c...aaahhh, nevermind, but yeah you don't want to be around them.
- An ex, for obvious reasons
- Somebody who loaned you $20 like 13 years ago and claims you never returned it but you know for fact you gave it back and they won't stop fucking mentioning it and they don't even want interest apparently, but no way in hell you're paying them again, it's the principles, not the money...
- An ant and an elephant who are about to breakup...
- Or any anthromorphic versions of wild, possibly dangerous animals, they shouldn't have to come to urban habitats to break up jfc, we need to preserve natural habitats!
10 Kinds of people you don't want to meet at a coffee shop
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