It's hard enough that you forget the name of the protagonist in the favourite arc of yours that you want to write. It's so so so much worse when you forget who she was or what she did, and begin wondering why was she a big deal again, her family history sounds interesting wonder what her mom's life was like. Like cheating on your character, you'll have disappointed her.
This I'm doing as a periodic reminder that a novel needs to be written comma by me comma and very soon. A crappy hackjob of a novel it maybe it doesn't matter the words need to emanate from the fingers the visuals in the eyes the sounds in my ears. I need to feel the cold rush of air and shiver as I write that weather up, feel the excitement at the prospect of being with a teenage self's partner alone and undisturbed in Kathmandu. Or have these become so commonplace there's nothing to it.
What am I doing here. What's the purpose Andy, what's the purpose of it, whyy are you doing this, the office asks Andy when he invites them to his garden party. He pretends it's just a fun garden party no hidden agenda no sirreee, the offices deduces that it's to impress the new CEO Boberto Carliforno. What's my purpose then, why am I doing this. Where do I want to go from here. These are tricky times for the best of us. I've seen smart cool level-headed folks make rash decisions at moment's notice because they're feeling the pressure they're under the stress of the collapsing world. People have turned about on how they think about things and their approach to dealing with life. Are they making thoughtful well-considered evaluations after consulting with close friends and family, or are they terrorized as we all been by the circumstances and the agent of them. When on a hike you step on the stone that's closest to your path, unless it's sharp pointy and has a snake ready to strike on it. What if we're there right now.
As I write this I've taken a twenty-minute break. Checking out apartments and sublets in Philly. Philly life would suit me for a bit, if I got a good temporary sublease, at a nice person's fully-furnished house. Prices seem to be allover the place, as if people aren't sure what the world is going to be looking like in three months. I suspect a LOT of scammers out there too, it's strange that when people are the saddest and in need of the most help these grifters see that as the perfect time to strike. A fully-furnished temporary sublet in the city of brotherly love for a few months would be lovely, if I can get my current place rid. Haven't taken photos of it yet, under the impression that the rental market was stable and of course people would be dying to take it off my hands. Not so it appears.
It's a little challenging, I need to find someone to take my room a reliable person my roommates can get on with and then get a short-term rental at my place at my destination. Many moving parts things are bound to fall out. It'll be an adventure.
In a good way, one hopes.
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