State of the (he)arts

 This is such nonsense like everything there is, but we're here so we have to talk. I really hate it when I'm under pressure to produce tens of thousands of words in a matter of a couple of hours because there's nothing else to talk about but myself so I'll unwittingly reveal secrets, maybe deep often not, about myself. They're not worth anything run with it if you want to.

I wrote in a published essay eleven years ago that I didn't know how to flirt, despite my friends trying quite a bit to teach me to. And I'm glad to say that's changed. Not over the course of the last decade oh noe noe noe, it's only a matter of the last eighteen months that have gone by that I learnt to talk to women in a potentially flirtatious way to suggest that I might be interested in them in a romantic possibly sexual way and would they perhaps consider thinking or shifting their window of consideration that direction or else we'd be in a disagreement about expectations from each other and that would be less than conducive for the ideal interpersonal relationship situation.

Okay not exactly in those nerdy terms but you get it. I can talk to women now. I think. Like for sure if they're not too cynical I can extend a thirty-second conversation to five-minutes, to thirty minutes, to texts and calls over weeks and months. Even years. Years, yes I've flirted my way into people's hearts over years. Well...That's where we'll stop for the moment.

I've only gotten as far as 'harmless flirting' which is great, awesome really and so much fun. But honestly I'd rather be in a situation to be doing something more...how do I put it without sounding like an asshole or an idiot...more...uhh harmful? Less...harmless? You know what I mean?

How do I close, that's my problem.

I'm stuck, talking to people or chatting them up there's no pressure to actually...do.. anything, you can get guidance and assistance from friends even family and there's a clear direction to go and an even clearer way to avoid. Do. Not. Escalate. It. To. The. Point. Where. Any. One. Of. The. Parties. Get. Uncomfortable. And. If. They. Do. Back. Out. Quicker. Than. A. Kangaroo.

I don't know for sure that Kangaroos back out of conversations quick, but ya' gotta be quick if you don't want to come off as an ass.

They don't call me a "Close-r', I've been called many things, but that's one epithet I'm yet to be given. Something I need to work towards.

This was dumb but the drought of good content is real.