I don't want to write anything but I must. Two more post. I have to do this. It's not an option. If I get this and another one, only ten more posts tomorrow, which seems a lot more achievable than 12, somehow. Also eight posts are going to be coming in pre-planned since I've got a list of titles in my google keep all fired up ready to be turned into meaty content.
But again I don't want to write. THere is nothing to write. My life is going, but nothing exciting or worth talking has happened. I don't know how to write fiction, my attempts at poetry read more like a mockery of the craft than legitimate attempts. Life in philly has been great, as you can deduce from my journal entries and general 'thoughtpieces' hahahaha but otherwise we stay at home watch tv eat a bunch and go out once every so often. Unremarkable.
Thoroughly unremarkable.
What a tricky position I've found myself in. So very unenviable.
The most exciting thing to potentially happen in my life as of this instance is the poker game that J invited us to play on thursday...it's supposed to be an online thing but N and I aren't sure how it'll work as you can only have a single deck of cards for texas hold'em and only four players, there's surely more than four players in their group. Ten bucks a buy-in is so cheap all things considered, twenty bucks for making friends and getting to know knew people is quite admirable. You cannot meet anybody under the context of just meeting people, as my EAP guide says, you have to meet them under some other context and ending up together somehow should be incidental, not intentional.
Big fat good it is gonna do to me if it's a bunch of dudes. Friends in a different city, that's something I guess, and never hurts to know more white people, don't know too many of those outside of work. So that's some.thing.
Besides that....Ugh.
Somebody sent me a message on viber, exactly a week after a send them a photo, it was so cringy. For me, I was cringing at myself for even having bothered sending the message. Am I really quite so desperate that I'm sending excited photos of the cool things happening here to people who so clearly don't give a rat's ass about what's new and happening? Or should I take the delusional path and imagine they're maybe not using viber at all and they reply probably whenever they're checking it out, once in several weeks. It's something that's possible but unlikely. Sad thing, I do have many friends and don't need this at all.
That's all the bullshit I can pull for one post.
Gotta save something for the last writing of the day.
No comments:
Post a Comment
Tell me what you think. I'll read, promise.