Ten things I learned at the nuclear powerplant

1. Don't put your hand in the machine no matter how confident you are and it looks like its not even moving but there's a bizarre whirring noise coming out of it and you want to check make really sure the motor's not broken and that this thing -- they call it the super-high speed centrifuge -- is actually moving moving. It wouldn't look still if it was actually moving, would it?
   
   
2. Creating handsy patterns around butts and chests of people's protective garment with the glowy material is fun and everything but both HR and security don't have a good humor about it. Also, don't make it look like something is dripping out from either of the orifices because they will absolutely freak out over it.
   
   
3. It is not a good idea to tell people Homer Simpson was your inspiration for joining the industry and one day you aspire to reach his level of success and stability in the industry.
   
   
4. Kayla brings extra cups of those honey-oat yogurts and forgets about it by the next day, so to get free yogurt cups you have to arrange the fridge so that she can only squeeze in her lunch deep into the machine.
   
   
5. The cameras in the kitchen aren't functional despite what they will have you believe during the orientation.
   
   
6. People can get really mean at work and write mean things near your workspace in glowing radioactive material.
   
   
7. That bitch Shannon from accounting is the cause of all the drama there is in the office and you could bet a hundred dollars it was her who told everyone about the funny patters because she was the only person who saw you do it, and you winked at her hoping she'd have forgotten. She used that sneakily for her advantage!
   
   
8. Not everything radioactive glows green, the water in the reactor also glows blue to due various nuclear reactions and energy absorption.
   
   
9. Kayla will just make a big deal out of everything, if she was saving up the yogurt cups for the next week she should just have informed everyone after doing it and not complain in front of thousands of people.E
   
   
10. Eee does indeed equal em see squared!