This was going to be a response to a prompt but I'm behind by exactly a day and don't have the energy to do that bs, so here it goes, a thousand or so words of unprompted nonsense absolute and total trash. I've warned you. Here. We. Go.
okay no I can't this is august 19 2020 and my stories are not worth reading, I went to RD's place, she lives ten mins walk from us. Heard dvjd's stories, they're entertaining they're real and they give you a sense of what it must have been to live his life. They're real stories he's a real storyteller I'm a fake, not even a fake, a hack a wannabe a tryhard who keeps trying hard keeps trying harder and harder and harder and just doesn't get it. I can't do this there's no good stories in my head to tell no fascinating tales nothing worth sharing what are we doing why are you here just go back this is awful i'm talentless and i'm stuck in this life, i had a dream when i was a teenager that i wanted to write wanted to become a writer because then i wrote better than the rest of my class but that's not true anymore. that's insufficient to become a writer. and besides i may rock at writing could be the best writer of all time it would matter an ounce if there are no good tales to tell.
i told him i'd bring a tape recorder and just record his stories maybe even start a podcast just out of what he had to say. his stories each and everyone of them could be turned into solid gold pieces of popular tales could be turned to tv shows and all of that and everyone would love them. and they're all real. he knows how to spin a yarn. i'm an idiot i didn't live an interesting life i don't have interesting things to talk about, nothing i say matters why am i even doing this no one wants to read anything i ever write this is just therapy and delusion.
this is just therapy and delusion. there is no hidden writer in there.
turn turn turn.
all of the above is true. im a talentless hack. i dont have interesting stories to tell. i cant even write. they're all too.
they're all good reasons for me to write more to read more and make a habit out of reading writing make it a practice, practice the craft till i improve soak in the tales till they are my own or write other people's stories too. the stories i write dont need to be all imaginary or of my own they can be someone else's stories too. and so what other people have good stories and are good yarnspinners they will only guide me show me the light to what true talent is they are my resources into an eventful and intersting lives. sowhat if i don't have interesting life i can live vicariously through others and work towards my goals.
it's going to be fine it's going to be fine. im just learning. im a student and this is just a test.
its ok. its all good. i live a happy life. i have good friends and family a strong support system. im doing well financially there's no complaints. i want to write and tell stories. i cant write and don't have good tales to tell. it's fine, i'll learn both. just keep writing and learning and reading and learning till i improve. i believe in me.
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