This is some bullshit I thought up two weeks ago, never got around to writing it, so here it is. The context for this is that I was thinking this before the move to Seattle. A lot of it still stands, though it's become moot at this point, it doesn't really matter what my feelings and emotions are anymore, the deed has been done.
Am I making the right direction? I ask myself why I decided to 'live in the moment', just visit Seattle for no good reason, and then one day out of random I said, you know what I'd like to move to this gosh-darned city, abandon my abode for the last ten years, the friends and connections I've made there, without any regards to the personal or financial move of such a temporary move, and just did it. Over a matter of a few short weeks. Which is quite ballsy by my standards because trust me there's no plans here. There's nothing in the 5-year view, not even the 2-year, or 6-month agenda. It's play by the looks.
So it's scary, it's wild. It feels like I'm jumping off a tall cliff into the ocean, and the water's looking nice and frothy but what if I hit the rocks, what if I break my pose and hit the water on the flat side, and smash my bones? What if something goes terribly wrong and I keep wondering why I chose to make such an underthought decision.
But it doesn't matter. I have decided to, ahem, live in the moment, to make decisions without worrying too much about the future or caring for the long-term consequences. I mean yeah the dangerous obvious ones I'll take care of, but besides that I'm going to take it easy. I've lived a naive and protected life for all of these years, never had a place to myself, never just moved like this, never made a jump with no plan. It's time I shake things up. If the future is going to be as interesting as I'm waiting or hoping it to be, I gotta be prepared for it. And this is the first step towards robustness.
Here it goes.
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