Sorry reader, sorry future me, I just don't want to write right now

 It's 10.30 in the evening, and I've had a few hours of not much happening, even besides the 3 hours of talking up I had to do to a close friend because a avalanche of issues were hitting her and she was in the gutter about everything. It's not that I don't have the energy to write, I have a fuckton, I have enough energy to fuckup the seven realms and beyond. Just. Don't. Want. To. Need some time to think and evaluate and consider and equivocate. About what, who knows but readers of the blog might be towards the right direction after reading recent posts. The future is uncertain, that much is sure, and the past is unknowable in all uncertainty. What's been hitting me the rough is the uncertainty and unknowability associated with the present and how I'm working in an information-poor environment. Also basically all Nepali people are like kinda super duper duper conservative it turns out, regardless of anything else so that kinda sucks. Not that I'm a 'liberal' mind, I'd rather not be seen that way, it's not my politics at all and my favourite hobby is to joke about how stupid the American liberals re. But ugh man, the standards are different it turns out and yet again it appears the reality I imagined I inhabited and the one I happen to live in don't seem to align. Or maybe I'm giving myself too rough of a time. There are options, ways out of this rut, we'll figure it out eventually. For right now though, things kinda' suck, all of 'em. Ugh.