So I went to Market Basket after quite a long time, almost six weeks to be exact, and did some groceries. Well...there wasn't much groceries done, just two bars of chocolate, one apple, a tub of yogurt and a pack of bokchoy, as much as there were medications.
Oh yeah, bought myself some medications. And not the ones I thought I did!
Lactase tablets, yes, because I'm mildly lactose intolerant and don't enjoy the feeling of de-gassing, so to speak, silent or otherwise, and the level of pungency doesn't really matter. I guess if it was a valve that was constantly letting out some pressure without causing any other issues, like those vents in New York or Boston or Philly that air out the subway, I might be okay with it, unfortunately the human body is not designed with strategically placed vents with cool art outside of them. As a result, one can find themselves in uncomfortable, sometimes embarrassing situations. And thus, the lactase.
Speaking of the gas situation, I saw there was a medicine called 'gas-x', supposed to help with bloating etcetera, and I thought, ahhh so this is the vaunted fartstopper, the valuable medicine tall white dudes take before they meet women, and hang out with their partners for the first couple of years or few months at least. So it looks like they're naturally resistant to flatulence but it's actually a marvel of medical science and not human body.
Apparently the particular medicine I bought so does do something similar, but in a manner different to what I imagined. It works by degassing the body, I'm told so you don't feel all gassy and bloated up so it's not that it'll stop your farts, but rather create great pressures on either of your extremities, to the effect of reducing pressure release in the future. So if you were seeing someone in say twelve or twenty-four hours, you'd take it now, and let nature take its course, and be prepared for the meeting.
The medication I was looking for was called 'beano', thought the name was too ridiculous, sounded like the name of a character from Disenchantment the series. And I'd already bought thirty bucks works of medications, so I figured this wasn't something I wanted immediately.
The other two medicines I bought are going to help me sleep. There's the hydro...whatever, it's called 'sleepytimes' or 'sleepaid' or something to the effect, it's got the same active component as literally every medication out there, 125 mgs of it. Supposed to put you to sleep real good, without the side effects or any sort of dependency. And finally I got myself some melatonin tablets, apparently they're incredible with putting one to sleep as well. With the combo of these medications, one each taken an hour before I intend to sleep, I'm locked and loaded for the night.
Only concern is I might wake up too early in the morning and be unable to sleep, a concern which I'll address in the next post.
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